Life without Phoebe
by burn-a-dark-soul5000
Summary: Phoebe is dead, and for once Helga is truly alone who will help her in her time of need? How will Helga live with Phoebe being dead? Read to find out!X3 HxA PxG *I'm back!*
1. Chapter 1: I'd like some Ice Cream

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **YES I KNOW IT SOUNDS MEAN, AND YES I KNOW PEOPLE WANT TO HURT ME BUT PLEASE READ IT FIRST. THIS TAKES PLACE AFTER FTI**

 **DISCLAIMER: I JUMPED ON A TABLE AND START TO SING**

 _ **LIFE SUCKS**_

 _ **WE CAN'T HAVE IT ALL**_

 _ **SO HEY ARNOLD**_

 _ **YOU CAN'T BE MINE!**_

* * *

 **Chapter 1: I'd like some Ice Cream. Please!**

As ten year old Phoebe Hyerdah was coming from her midnight spelling bee. (Winning first place of course.) She happily jumped into the back of her fathers car. "Phoebe, hun. Do you want to go out for ice cream to celebrate ya win?" Her county mother asked Phoebe smiled joyously. The only time she eat things with no nutritional value, was if they were celebrating. It wasn't that it was an uncommon event (Phoebe winning a lot of awards and all.)but she was happy all the same.

Phoebe smiled politely, "Yes mother I rather enjoy such that very much." She said sweetly, Mr. Hyerdahi smiled proudly at his daughter until. "Can Helga come along as well, her sister Olga is home and her father wanted them to bond. So we would have to go and get her, but could she please come along?" She exclaimed hopefully. Phoebe's father gave a tired sigh. "Phoebe I will never understand why you hangout with that girl. You and I know she's nothing but bad news." Unlike Phoebe's mother, Mr. Hyerdahi never really liked Helga. He believed she was a bad influence on his sweet daughter Phoebe.

Phoebe frowned and gave a tired sigh herself. "Fathet I know your not very fond of Helga however, she is my friend for a reason." Phoebe said firmly. Mrs. Hyerdahi looked at her young daughter and smiled softly. "Phoebe dear I think ya father just wants to know why ya care about your friend so much." She explained gently. Phoebe smiled sadly. "Helga is many things, she's strong, stubborn, witty, protective of the ones she care about, sweet, kind, thoughtful, poetic, selfless, Helga she... she's just all around an amazing person!" Phoebe said growing more and more excited as she explained.

Then Phoebe gave another sad smile as her voice soften. "Yet Helga is also secretive, and protective of her heart as well. I am one of the two people Helga has ever let in and I can understand why, she has been hurt by so many people, so many times. To make it worse it's the people that are supposed to care about her the most." Phoebe smiled brightly. "I am so very lucky to be the one she calls her best friend, to see a side of her that only myself and that other person know about! I love the fact that she thinks of me as her rock when she really needs me to be! She's like and older sister, and the greatest best friend I could ever have!" Phoebe exclaimed crying a little from her heart full speech.

Mrs. Hyerdahi felt tears prick her eyes as well, but quickly wiped them away. "Phoebe you really care about that Helga gal, huh?" Mrs. Hyerdahi asked her daughter. Phoebe smile only brighten more as she nodded happily. Mr. Hyerdahi smiled just as brightly as his daughter. " Well little one, sure we can get her. After such a speech that not only opened my eye, it touch my heart as well. How could I not bring Helga along to get ice cream with us?!" Phoebe beamed happily as she giggled _Ice cream_ _!_ _we're getting_ _Ice cream! Helga would find that so amusing. _ Phoebe thought to herself giggling some more.

Everyone in the Hyerdahi family sat in a nice silence letting the street lights fly by them. Phoebe smiled grew more and more as she and her family seen Helga house slowly come to view. Unfortunately they did not notice the speeding drunk truck driver.

 _ **C-CRASH!**_

Phoebe's last thought was not her ten year old life. No, it was a flash of friends smiling faces. Then it was three year old Helga holding her hand out to Phoebe, smiling a smile Phoebe has only seen that one time before she locked her heart away.

 _ **-FLASHBACK-**_

 _" If you stick with me I promise no one will mess with you!" Three year old Helga said proudly. Phoebe looked at her tears of awe falling from her eyes. "Really you p-promise." Said Phoebe shyly. Helga looked at her giving her a smile that made an angel's smile look ugly. "I promise Phoebe, or my names not Helga. G. Pataki." Helga said softly almost motherly. Phoebe smiled brightly as she watched their friendship be born. However that day Phoebe made a promise to herself that she knew Helga knew. I promise I'll get stronger like you too, Helga._

 _Phoebe thought to herself as she watch Helga walk with confidence in the preschool. Phoebe keep her promise growing little by little with Helga's help._

 _ **-FLASHBACK END-**_

Phoebe lets a tear run down her cheek as she realized, she would never get the chance to see that smile again. _I am so sorry Helga... I can't help you with **ICE CREAM** anymore... I-I broke my promise we made..._ Phoebe thought to herself as the darkness claimed her family and herself.

.

.

.

 _ **CRASH!**_

Ten year old Helga. G. Pataki stood in the middle of her room as the glass cup she was drinking from slipped from her hand, were it shattered on the floor. _What the heck was that...?_ Helga didn't know why but, suddenly she felt as if a piece of her, not as big as Arnold, yet still very, VERY. Important just was ripped away from her. Helga grabbed her remote and turned her T.V on to the news. In bold words it said

 **HYERDAHI FAMILY KILL IN CAR CRASH!**

It was as if time stood still and silence fell apon the Earth. _Phoebe Hyerdahi...was dead._

 _...what...?_

 _And all just for some ice cream._

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 **PLEASE DON'T FLIP OUT, IN THE END I COULD NEVER. EVER! END A STORY ON A SAD NOTE UNLESS I WAS MAD. THEN THE GLOVES COME OFF. SOO IT'S ALL GOOD! XD ALSO HEADS UP IN THE NEXT CHAPTER HELGA WILL KNOW ABOUT THE PROMISE HOW? IF YOU READ 'DARK SALVATION BY JADED ANGEL' AN AWESOME FANFIC, ALONG WITH 'NOT SOULMATE BY X5D.' IT WILL TELL YOU HOW. ALSO IT GAVE HINTS FROM THE SUMMERY. SOUL MATES JUST KNOW THIS STUFF. -SHRUGGED-**

 ** _READ, REVIEW, FOLLOW! X3_ **


	2. Chapter 2 It's a day full of Punches !

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: I...I guess I don't have one... eh.**

 **DISCLAIMER: "MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL. WHO DOES HEY ARNOLD BELONG TO?" FACE IN THE MIRROR LOOKS BORED. "Dear we've been through this thought and thought HEY ARNOLD does not belong to you."**

* * *

 **Chapter 2: It's a day full of Punches.**

-Two Weeks Later-

It has been raining for weeks now, no one has taken notice however. Everyone just thought is was normal for this time of year. Yet Helga as funny as it sounds was thankful for the rain, she herself could not cry...well she cried once since this all happened, yet those were tears of anger. So she was glad someone was really crying for her."You've been gone for two weeks now..." Helga said as she stood in front of her best friend's grave, she continued softly. "You took her with you when you left..." The nine year old said as a peace of her hair fell out of place. She had stop wearing her hair up since her friend's death.

She didn't feel like making her hair into pigtails anymore."Phoebe...now..now that your gone I-I'm alone..why...I-I." She bet her bottom lip to keep from crying. As Helga took a shaky breath she gave the head stoon a sad smile. "I punched Gerald in the face last week, I'm sorry I know how much you like him like him."

 ** _-FLASHBACK-_**

 _It's been a week since the car accident...since Phoebe's death, and Helga has said nothing to no one. She didn't eat with everyone, she eat alone in the classroom. That day Brainy came out of nowhere and gave her a hug. She didn't push him away, she didn't have the energy to. Plus Helga would never admit it but she has grown fond of Brainy, his loyalty to her was almost like Phoebe's. Yet nothing could replace her she was Helga's rock... she-_

 _ **"OH GIVE IT A REST!"** Came a far off voice. Helga raised her head to see an angry Gerald before her. "You've been moping around for a week now stop it! You didn't care about Phoebe, you're mad you can't find a new assistant!" Gerald yelled grabbing everyone's attention._

 _Helga's eyes lite up with a flame she never knew she had. "What!" Helga yelled, she then let out a low, deep, and dark growl. This was new to everyone it even scared Wolfgang. It scared everyone, everyone but Gerald. However his anger was but a ember compared to Helga's flame of pure rage. Gerald continued._

 _"Yeah all you did was push her around you never cared about her. She alway followed you blindly. Now she's gone and you still don't-" **SMACK!** Gerald flew to the ground when he looked up rage filled his eyes, yet his breath caught in his throat whenbhe looked at Helga. Him along with everyone else was shocked for two reasons. One Helga punched him, she said she would but no one other then Herald and Brainy has ever felt her wrath._

 _And two more importantly...Helga. G. Pataki... was crying. "Phoebe the only one I had! The only..she was..." Helga could not continue her voice and eyes became hollow as she fled the cafeteria ignoring the eyes and whispers that followed her._

 _Brainy turn back towards Gerald who was still on the floor as he took out his inhaler and took a few puffs of air before speaking. "Helga maybe a bully..." Brainy had to stop and roll his eyes at that. He seen the real side of Helga the one only Phoebe, Arnold, and himself knew about. **(Phoebe doesn't know Brainy knows...I think.)** "But Phoebe was like a sister to her... one she really did love. Just because you didn't tell Phoebe how you felt about her, doesn't mean you can take your pain out on Helga." With that Brainy left. Leaving everyone stun and deep in thought._

 ** _-FLASHBACK END-_**

Helga was so deep in thought that she didn't see the sky start to clear. A ray of sun light cascaded down through the clouds, and fell upon the sad girl. Most people would welcome the site, but Helga wasn't like most people. She didn't want it to stop raining, Helga felt something wet below her eye. At first she hoped it was starting to rain again, however she knew she wasn't that lucky. Helga slowly reached up to touch her eye.

When she pulled her hand back she saw that she was indeed crying...crying. Seeing that one tear caused the full blown sobs she was holding back to crash down on her like a ton of bricks.

"Why Phoebe?! What were you doing around my house that was so important that you had to die?! What about our promise? You said you were going to get stronger, that you would stay by my side! You lied to me! You left my and now I'm alone... You held me together... why Phoebe..? Our promise..." Helga yelled to the sky not caring if anyone could hear her. She was so tired amd was starting to get physically sick. So much so that she started to fell dizzy. Before passing out Helga could also make out a figure that looked like her best friend.

"Phoebe?" Helga said softly. She was so tired that it came out a whisper. Phoebe looked at Her best friend, and smiled sadly. "I sorry Helga. I didn't mean to break your trust... I love you, you know." Helga sniffed one more time feeling her self fade fast. She gave the Phoebe figure a sad smile too. "I love you too, Phoebe..." Helga said passing out. Phoebe smiled and kissed her best friend on her forehead.

Helga felt it, the kiss and two small arms pick her up. Helga felt like she could almost hear a pig screeching around her. She was to tired to care why the pig was there also who was holding her, but who ever it is she does feel safe in their arms. Maybe they could help with the pain in her heart too.

* * *

 **You can't have sunshine without some rain.**


	3. Chapter 3: What's my saving grace now?

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ WILL SHOCK YOU...okay not really.**

 **DISCLAIMER: WHO HAS TWO HANDS AND DOESN'T OWN NOTHING... Guess. XD**

* * *

Chapter 3: What's my saving grace now?

Helga opened her eyes to see a skylight above her head, one she knew all to well... _crap..._ Helga thought to herself. "What time is it?" She said to no one. "Almost 8:30, dear." A voice said. Helga snapped her head over to where the voice was coming from. Next to Arnold's desk was Arnold's grandma, Gertie. "Hello, Gertie." Helga said in a whisper. Helga knew Gertie's pranks, games, and jokes, were all an act. One that Helga has grown to love.

Sometimes when Helga knew Arnold was not home, she would come over just to see the old couple. They knew her secret, they were even helping her keep it. Besides this woman was full of wisdom, it may have seem random at first. But if you really got to know her everything she said would make sense. Helga tried to offer her a smile, but she fell flat. "Can you tell me what happened?" Helga asked her memory a little fuzzy.

Gertie nodded. "Arnold said that he found you outside past out by you friend's..." She did not finish. Helga understood she was trying not to hurt her. Like she was fragile, Helga sighed not wanting to get mad at the old woman. "Is that all." She asked. Gertie nodded. "Yes, he carried you here soaking wet so I changed you clothes. I dried them and now there on the couch." Gertie said softly. She knew Helga didn't like this, and Gertie would go back to being her wacky self later.

But for now she also knew Helga needed a shoulder to cry on. "Helga..." Gertie tried to speak but Helga raised her hand. "Gertie I am fine... I was just...not feeling well. I knew I should have stayed home." Helga said, rubbing the back of her head. Gertie sighed, yes she knew Helga. She knew her well enough to know that she was lying.

However Gertie also knew not to pry, so she smiled at Helga sincerely. "Okay, Helga. But if you ever needed me you know I am here for you." Gertie said to Helga like she was family. Helga, who did not notice Gertie coming towards her. Turned her head only to be pulled into a warm, caring, motherly hug. Helga could feel the all love in it, and it took everything she had not to break down.

So before Helga gave her self the satisfaction to give into Gertie's warmth. She gently pushed her away, and gave her an apologetic smile. "I should go before it to late...at night." Helga said. She was starting to feel like she could not breath. Gertie understood that she was just trying to escape, however Gertie did not stop her. She only got up as Helga did walked into Arnold's closet. As Helga was done putting on her pink jumper. Gertie came from Arnold's closet holding a green umbrella in her hands.

"Hel-" Helga raised her hand, giving Gertie a ghost of a smile. "Please, It's Eleanor. I will be fine Mrs. Shortman, thanks for taking care of me." And with that Helga left from the skylight.

A few minutes later Arnold came into his room to see what was going on. "Grandma, where is Helga?" Gertie snapped out of her worried gaze, and placed a big bright smile on her face. "Oh, Eleanor said she had to improve her defenses, for the Princess in the tower." Gertie said in an animated way she always said things.

Arnold gave her a confused look, then shocked his head. "Never mind grandma, she must have left." Arnold said walking out of his room. Gertie stood there and looked at the spot Arnold walked away from, before she too shocked her head. "Why was I the one that had the dense grandson." She with a sigh. "Well at least he's better then... _Arnie."_ She finished with a shiver.

Gertie then turned back to the skylight, were Helga just left from. "Please be safe, Eleanor. Don't build your walls up to high, or else they'll come crashing down on you." Gertie said softly before she left Arnold's room as well.

...

When Helga finally made it home she was soaking wet again; despite the fact she had Arnold's umbrella. She didn't want to open it, she just the rain hit her skin. _I'll shower when I get home..._.She told herself. When Helga opened the door. The house never looked so dark, it was dark because... it was so _bright._ "WELCOME HOME OLGA!" Bob and Miriam said happily. When they got a good look to see it was only Helga, their face dropped.

"Oh, it's only the girl." Bob said disappointment lacing his voice. Miriam sighed. "I think I need a smoothie." She said now looking tired. "MOMMY! DADDY!" Said a voice so sweet that it could give sugar cavities. "OLGA!" Bob and Miriam said happy again. Olga Pataki smiled happily as she pushed her sister out the way to hug her mother and father. Helga stood there not shocked, just more dead inside.

Helga did the first thing that came to mine...she laughed. She fall over laughing, as everyone stopped and looked at her like she was crazy. "This...this is to good...Y-you look so disappointed when you see me at the door...b-but when it's OLGA you rush to her side." Helga started to laugh even harder. "M-my best and only friend died two weeks ago and no one even gave me a pity hug."

Bob who was growing more confused spoke first, not caring about Helga's state of mine. "You mean Noebe? You just saw her last week?" Helga looked at her father pure hate, in her eyes. "Her name is PHOEBE you FUCKING ASSHOLE!" Helga yelled. Bob looked at her shocked, then angry himself. "Don't talk to me like that. You're only SIX."

Helga, never losing the dark look of hate in her eyes. Just yelled back at her father more outraged. "I'm ten you FUCKIN' IDIOT! YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE CALLED A FATHER! YOU SON OF A BIT-" Before Helga could finish her rant she felt Bob's hand collided with her face. She would have fallen if it was not for Bob holding her by her shirt. Bob brought Helga up to his face breathing heavily, from his own anger.

"Do not ever disrespect me again, I am you FATHER. I own you, got it." Helga did not look scared instead, her face looked blank. Honesty Bob hated Helga's eyes, they could look so cold yet burn at the same time. It filled him with rage. "Understood, _BOB."_ Helga said with a snarl _._ Bob back handed her, before letting her go so she could fall to the ground.

"Go to your room." Helga calmly stood to her feet and walked away. As she was walking up the stairs, Helga could hear her sister's sugar sweet voice. "Why couldn't Helga be a good girl like me?" Olga said with a sigh. Then when she reached the door. What she heard Miriam say next, nearly broke her. "Sometimes I wonder why I keeped, her." With that all the light was sucked out of Helga's eyes.

Helga slammed her door so she wouldn't hear them talk. _FUCKIN' BASTERDS I KNEW THEY NEVER GAVE A SHIT ABOUT ME! I know I'll run away..._ Helga thought to herself, then she came to a stop. _But where can I go for a while..._ Helga snapped her fingers. "PHOE-" Helga stopped her eye grew wide, then fell into a dead half lidded look.

Helga was so mad she almost forgot."Oh, yeah."Helga fell to the center of her rug in her room, as she pulled her legs to ber chest... _So close to forgetting. It... it hurts to breath_.Helga thought to herself. That night she did not cry, she did not sleep. She just sat there thinking about ger lost friend, and how everything just feels worse without her best friend.

* * *

 **MAN! IT IS JUST SO EASY TO HURT THIS GIRL *SIGH*.**

 **can't have sunshine without some rain...**


	4. Chapter 4: I'm Drowning !

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **I HAVE NO CLUE WHERE THIS IS GOING... NONE WHAT SO EVER! _enjoy!_**

 **DISCLAIMER: "I OWN NOTHIN'!" I walked away and peeople started exploding. _"Tough guys don't look back at explosions!"_ Someone in the background is singing. I turn around. "So cool!" XD ×lover not a fighter!×**

* * *

Chapter 4: I'm drowning.

 _~Two weeks, later after The Hit._

 _Four weeks, later after the accident.~_

After Helga stood up to Bob all hell broke loose. Helga would come home to Bob. Just to get beaten, he would yell hateful things at her, tell her she's worthless, and that no one would love her. Now she comes to school broken and bruised, no one seem to notice... no one ever noticed. Helga woke up in her newest pool of blood... _Helga. G. Pataki... Iron fist of P_ _.S 118 ... You are so PATHETIC!_ Helga thought to herself. She didn't want to get up she knew what she would see if she did. Helga didn't want to get up, but she had to.

Like clockwork, Helga would come home, get yelled at by Bob, get beaten by Bob, and wake up two hours before school, but that not the worse part. No Helga could live with all that, honestly she didn't need Bob.

As Helga finally got up the first person she saw...was Miriam. Ever since Bob started his nightly beating sessions. It was like Miriam took the morning shift, she was still a druck... she is druck. However Miriam forum of abuse was verbal... _yet the tongue is the sharpest blade anyone can hold_. "I didn't want you, you know." She ask Helga that same question for the pass two weeks, and Helga had to answer her, or Bob would get mad. "Yes.."

Helga said wobbling to get up. She had to clean up this blood on the floor, do her home work, get ready for school, take a shower, and get dressed, and put on her makeup. "We wanted a boy, but you popped out. I knew we should have checked, but Bob said. _'It's a boy, he has a good kick, a strong leg, it's a boy, it's a boy!'_ No you where a girl. So really this is all your fault." Miriam said in a drunken slur. Somewhere in the back of Helga's mind she knew Miriam was wrong, but her head was so clouded now. She was drowning, and no one could save her, why would they? She was _worthless._

Helga jumped in the shower after she had gotten all her blooed off the floor. She just stood there as she watched all the dry blood on her wash down the drain. After Helga dried herself off she got dress. Helga no longer wore her pink jumper. Bob ripped them all up from his afternoon beatings, plus that would have shown off her bruises. Now Helga worn jeans, one of Olga's black shirts, and her purple jacket.

To Helga's disguised, she had to wear makeup to hide the bruises. It made her sick, Helga knew she was ugly, she had to be. And the makeup she wore made her hate herself More, but other people seem to like it. Rhonda said she would be pretty if she got rid of her unibrow. Boys even gave her a second look, but they did not really like her like her.

As she walked down stairs Miriam stood next to the door. _Why does she still talk to me if she going to say something mean..._ Helga thought to herself. She was going to walk past her, but Miriam grabbed her and forced her to turn around. Miriam looked her straight in the eyes, and as she breathed in and out. The smell of alcohol filled Helga's nostrils, finally Miriam said something, the worst thing she could ever say.

"That boy will never love such an ugly bitch like you."

All the air was sucked out of Helga's lungs, that did it... Helga was officially broken. Helga used all the energy she had to push Miriam off of her, and throw the door open. Helga rushed out the house and around the corner. She knew what would happen next, she just prayed for once that it wouldn't.

 _"OOF!"..._ It did.

"I'm sorry, Helga." Arnold told her politely. Helga looked up, it was Arnold and Gerald. They both looked at her confused. "Helga?" Arnold asked worry clearly in her voice. She didn't answer him she just stood back up, and ran faster leaving a confused and worried Arnold and Gerald behind.

Helga rushed off to school not looking back.

 _What's wrong with you pull it together! You can't lose your cool because she tild you the truth!_ Helga thought to herself as she rushed into the school building.

...

In class Helga felt everyone looking at her... she didn't like it. Helga growled. "What are you chuckleheads looking at!" Helga said with a snarl. "Helga what's with your new look." Sid asked. "Yeah you look like a girl!" Herald yelled. Everyone looked at her intensely, then Helga did something they did not expect.

Helga gave a tired sigh, and rolled her eyes. "I will do what ever the hell I want, got it?!" Everyone was taken aback, and turned around. "Well I never." Rhonda said under her breath, again Helga rolled her eyes. Right on time, Mr. Simmon walked into the room. "Hello class!" He said happily. He noticed the angry and worried looks on his students faces. "Um...What's wrong?" He asked the class kindly.

"Helga is being really roud." Rhonda said. Mr. Simmon smiled politely at Helga. "Helga will you please apologize to your class." Helga didn't have the will to fight, she just stood up her eyes dead, and her voice tired and sore. "I apologize for being rude." She said sitting back down. frowning, her tone did not that bit he was used to, and knew was fake. "Hel-" was cut off by the sound of Rhonda screaming in disguise. He turned around to see Curly trying to kiss Rhonda on the lips. "Curly cut it out or I will have to call your mother." said in warning tone.

Curly reluctantly sat down, sighed. "Okay class lets get started!" He said cheerful, forgetting all about what he was about to say to Helga. Class started without a hitch.

By the time poetry time rolled around, Helga wanted nothing more then to disappear. Every time she tried to write an Arnold poem, she had to will back burning tears. Now everthing she made sound so sad and depressing. took up everyone's poem, tossing a secret smile Helga's way. Yet all she did was put her head down in shame.

"Okay class it poetry time, but first I would like to read a poem and of course it's by Anonymous." Mr. Simmon said with a smile. Helga shifted uncomfortably in her spot.

"I will not. By : Anonymous." He said cheerfully.

"I will not cry a tear,

I will not show my fear,

Because if I did my fear would grow in me.

I will just say name, given by those who hurt me.

I will not cry a tear,

I will not show my fear.

I will walk these halls with the boy that is forever,

Out of my reach.

That is a lesson I have learned,

That love is something I will never earn.

I will not cry a tear,

I will show my fear.

But I am so tired,

My heart is weak from this seemingly endless battle.

I feel that there is not much more I can take.

In the back of my mind I ask, _how much more before I break._

 _However..._

I will not cry a tear,

I will not show my fear.

Because that is weakness,

And I must be strong.

But I wonder _how_ long,

How long could this tired soul go on."

By the time he was done reading everyone was crying, Mr. Simmon had a few tears in is eyes as well. "Oh Anonymous! Who has hurt you so badly?!" Rhonda asked dramatically, Helga gave a tired chuckle. _If she knew it was mine..._ Helga thought to herself. Rhonda must have heard her laugh because she sent her a dirty look. "And _what!_ is so funny, Pataki?!" Rhonda asked angrily. That only made Helga chuckle more.

Rhonda looked outraged. "You know what Helga I felt bad for you, since Phoebe died and all! However if anyone should feel like they could not be loved, it is you!" Everyone fell silence, some agreeing with Rhonda. Mr. Simmon felt bad for not being able to tell the other kids is was Helga's poem he had just read, but he had to respect Helga's wishes to keep quiet. For just a second he saw the flash of pure pain and sorrow in her eyes.

It was only a second but he saw it, but then she covered that pain with anger like she always did. "Psh! Whatever like I would want some idiotic boy to fall for me!" Helga said with a huff. Rhonda snarled. "Good because who would fall for someone as ugly as you?!" Rhonda yelled. Again saw the flash of pain in her eyes.

He, and unknown to his knowledge, a small football headed boy. He was not sure if he saw it the first time, but the second time confirmed it for Arnold. Helga was hiding her pain.

...

Twice in a four week period all hell broke loose for Helga after class people sent her dirty looks and were even throwing things at her. Helga felt as if she could no longer breath. _Who knew people cared so much about someone they think they don't know...are that Rhonda could spread the word so fast._ Helga let out a short sigh of relief that school was over, but her relief was short lived. The poor fifth grader felt a bucket of water poured on her.

Helga looked in front of ger to see two six grade girls standing there looking satisfied with what they did. "We just wanted to show the world your true ugly colors." The tall one side with glee. They both walked away laughing as Helga stood there in horror. She could feel the makeup run. "Helga?" She gasped. Arnold looked at her, the look of terror in her eyes.

"Helga is something wrong?" Arnold asked as he grabbed her wrist. Helga shrieked im pain, and Armold quickly pulle back his hand. "Helga what's wrong?!" He asked as he turned her around so she was facing him. Then Arnold gasped as he saw the bruises begin to show on her face. Helga knew he saw it, saw the palm print on her cheek and her black eye.

"Oh my gosh Helga. Your face." Arnold eyes widen. _snap! that came out wrong!_ Arnold thought to himself as he saw that same flash of pain and sorrow in her eyes. But this time there was something else... _heartbreak._ Helga quickly pulled away and ran.

 _I knew it he does think I'm ugly! He could never love me!_ Helga thought tears blurring her vision. _I-I don't think I can do it anymore! Phoebe I-I can't take this pain! I-I need this to end!_ Helga continued to run, unaware of a football headed boy following her worry in his eyes. Worry and something else he couldn't put his finger on.

* * *

 **Okay sorry but I'm kinda at a fork now. This could end this three ways.**

 **1.) Happily ever after!**

 **2\. )Bittersweet.**

 **And 3.)Sad ending.**

 **So could you tell me what ending you would like to see, and I'll make it but first.**

 ** _R &R please! X3_**


	5. Chapter 5: Take My Hand

**LIFE WITHOUT PHOEBE**

 **Yo..I don't know what the people want, but I know what I want so.. I will not make a sad ending. But you don't know what will happen next. Besides if I did make a sad ending that would mean, this would be the last chapter. I can't have that, no way, no how!**

 **DISCLAIMER: PULL UP TO MICJ'S. "Hello, may I take your order?" A voice from the speaker asked. "Yes, Could I have a Hey Arnold combo?" I asked nicely. There was a pause, then laughter poured from the speaker. I drive away angry. "You didn't have to be a dick about it.**

* * *

 **Chapter 5: Take My Hand.**

 _-Recap-_

 _I knew it he does think I'm ugly! He could never love me! Helga thought tears blurring her vision. I-I don't think I can do it anymore! Phoebe I-I can't take this pain! I-I need this to end! Helga continued to run, unaware of a football headed boy following her, worry in his eyes. Worry and something else he couldn't put his finger on._

 _~HxA~_

It was starting to rain again, but Helga didn't care she was so tired of it all. Helga really couldn't see through her tears, so it didn't surprise her when she fell in a puddle of water. She wanted to lay there, she would have layed there, but she heard someone shout her name. Helga looked over her shoulder to see it was Arnold. She knew she should be happy that he was chasing after her, she should but... she wasn't.

Helga felt fear rush through her vains, she didn't want Arnold to see her like this. Helga jumped up to her feet and with the litte rish of adrenalin, she ran as fast as her leg would let her. Helga did not know how, nor did she care, but she ended up at the pier. Helga was so tired, and she felt so weak. She knew she lost Arnold.

So maybe she could rest, just for a little. Helga waddled as she made her way to the end of the pier. Helga sat down and looked at the endless water before her, how it looked so pretty underneath the stormy skies. Helga then cast her gaze to the water under the pier she was sitting on. The water looked like the heavenly night sky so calm, so dark, and most of all... so peaceful. Helga looked at herself in the water, and thought about jumping in until she heard a soft thunk in between her legs.

Helga looked down to see it was something she didn't know she grabbed, something she hasn't looked at, or thought about for weeks... her _locket._ Helga looked at it for a second before she picked it up, (Ignoring the zing of pain she felt as she did so.) and opened it to gaze at the message she left in there months ago.

 _Arnold my soul you will always have my heart_

 _Love:_

 _Helga. G. Pataki!_

Helga felt soft tears roll down her cheek as she remembered all the hateful thing said to her.

 _"You worthless bitch! You ugly smug on my family's name! Give me a good reason why I shouldn't kill you know!" Bob said as he beat her with his lucky belt._

 _"B did you know she liked that football headed boy." Miriam scoffed. "Like he would ever love someone like you, Helga. Please!" Miriam was taunting her, in the worst way imaginable._

 _"Who could ever love someone as ugly as you?!" Rhonda voice yelled in her ear._

 _"We just wanted to show the world how ugly you are." The six grade girls giggled._

Helga thought the flashbacks finally passed until the one she wished would fade, rushing at her Helga remembered the look on Arnold's face. A look of horror and disguise, Helga's breathing became shallow as she was forced to remember that look.

Helga began to sob, as if Phoebe just died yesterday. "Why! Why did you have to leave?! I have nothing and no one now! Phoebe I- ... OH GOD! Phoebe it hurts!" Helga cried to the heavens above her.

Helga sobbed as she looked as the calm waters under her feet.

 _I bet I could finally sleep if I jumped. I could end all this pain, and best of all I could finally be with Phoebe. We could be best friends again, I-I wouldn't be alone anymore..._ Helga thought to herself more than anything, she wanted this sorrow to end. To finally breath in without feeling pain rush into her chest. Helga sat there letting the rain hit her flesh, and her soaking wet clothes.

Helga looked at her locket... at the face of the one person she longed, and ached for. Someone she knew, she could never have, there was just no way they could ever be. Helga allowed more tears to fall silently from her eyes as she gazed at her beloved. Yes he was beloved by all... including her.

 _He could do so much better then me... I bet when he gets older any girl would want to have him, and give him more love then I ever could._ Helga looked at the locket a little longer, before she did something that she thought would seal her fate.

Helga slowly allowed the locket to slip out of her hand and into the calm sea water...so calm. The water was calling to her gently, like it was singing to her soul.

 _ **"Helga... Helga come here."** _ A woman voice softly called to her.

Helga looked up, out to the wide sea . "Yes... Come where?" Helga asked standing up, still feeling a little weak.

 ** _"Come rest... You deserve the freedom we could give you."_** The female voice said to her.

Helga still in a daze. "Who is this 'we'? Is it Phoebe, she there too?" Helga asked hope clear in her voice.

The female voice giggled. _**"Yes. She is here, but I mean the people here that love you. That know you need rest, that you need this freedom, that they long to give you."** _ She said lovingly.

Helga walked over to the edge of the pier, and looked over.

 ** _" Helga, I could take you to a place is untouched by sorrow, by hurt, by pain. A place of pure joy, of love, of healing. Just take my hand Helga, and I could make it all better."_**

Helga looked over the pier and into the water. She could see it clearly... a hand. Someone that was willing to help her, love her, take her to Phoebe. She could finally leave... forever. No one could hurt her, break her heart, tell her she was worthless. She could finally be free, all she had to do was take her hand.

Helga layed down on her stomach her arms over the pier's edge.

 _ **" Yes Helga. Just take my hand."** _ The woman said her voice flowing like the calm water its self. Helga just had to get a little closer.

A Helga's hand finally reached the water's edge, and she could have sworn she felt fingers lace with her own.

 _I'm finally free..._ Helga thought to herself as she fell into the water. A sad smile on her lips, completely unaware of the little boy that ran up behind, her just as she fell in.

* * *

 **A/N: Don't get mad like I said I will not end this on a sad note. Just keep reading it'll be worth it promise, promise!**

 _ **R &R please! X3 **_


	6. Chapter 6 Won't Let Go! P1

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **Well... I gots me some writers block for my other stories. Mostly because I have other ideas...DAMN MY BIG IMAGINATION! At least I can make this chapter. Also the next two or three chapters take place from Helga at the Cemetery to her jumping off the pier. Oh, and this is all Arnold's POV**

 **DISCLAIMER: "Hali!" My friend Asha yelled. "Yeah!" I called back. She holds a gun up. "You wanna rob a bank?!" She asked. I shocked my head. "Nah, I'm making this disclaimer." She rolled her eyes. "Just say you don't own it, and come on!" I rolled my eyes as well. "Golb, glob it! FINE!" I yelled turning towards the screen. "I own nothing!" With that I grabbed my gun a left.**

* * *

 **Chapter 6:** Won't let go

 _~Two weeks after the accident~_

Arnold was known as many things, most of the time that was being dense. Yet the young ten year old was far from that, no. He was very alert. He just choose to stay quiet about the things he saw, if he saw any thing (because he was a little dense). On this day Arnold has noticed, that every day since the passing of Phoebe Hyerdahi It began to rain. Arnold knew that it was stupid, but Arnold had the strange urge to go walking. Without a second thought ( after grabbing an umbrella, of course) he left with Abner by his side.

Arnold had a lot on his mind, mostly a special pigtails bully. _She's changed a lot since Phoebe died._ Arnold thought to himself. He truly felt bad for not comforting Helga, he knew he should have. After hearing on the news that Phoebe died, Arnold was in shocked. He remembered the look on Helga's face coming to school the next day. She was quiet, and closed of, just...there.

 ** _-FLASHBACK-_**

 _Mr. Simmon walked into the room and looked right at Helga, who turned her gaze. "Class...I-I don't know how to say this..." Mr. Simmon said quietly. "...Phoebe's dead." Helga's voice rang throughout the class room. Everyone sat there... Arnold was sure Curly dropped his pencil. "W-what?" Gerald asked Helga in a sheepish voice._

 _Mr. Simmon took over the question and answer for Helga, knowing she was in a lot of pain. "She was in-" Helga raised her hand not looking up. "Might I step out, please." Helga said meekly. No one seem to notice or care for the moment. Mr. Simmon nodded, as Helga walked out of the class Mr. Simmon continued telling his class the news. "Yes last night it said that Phoebe and her family were on her way to Helga's house after coming from a competition."_

 _Mr. Simmon took pause for breath, trying to calm himself. "I guess they didn't see the drunk truck driver that was speeding towards them." Everyone was quiet for a minute trying to process this new information. Gerald was the first to speak. "Why was Phoebe around Helga's house?" He asked a little mad for some reason. Rhonda huffed. "Maybe Helga told her to bring the a book or something." She said angry by her own accusation. Everyone started to think the same thing. Arnold saw out the corner of his eye._

 _That Brainy stayed quiet, Arnold wasn't sure; bit he thought he saw a flash of anger slip on to Brainy's features. Yet it was only there for a second, then as soon as it came it was gone. Arnold looked back at Mr. Simmon, who himself looked as if he was trying to bit his tongue. "Maybe that's why she stepped out." Herold said noticing Helga left the room. Arnold wasn't sure , but he was starting to get angry at his classmates for saying such nasty things about Helga._

 _Before he could tell them to stop, Helga walked back into the room. She didn't say anything to anyone, not even caring about the fact that all eyes are on her. "Helga who could ya live wit all that there guilt?" Stinky asked in a scornful manner. Helga lifted her head only a tiny bit. "What did you say?" Arnold has never heard Helga's voice so... cold._

 _Stinky shocked his head turning around. "Nothin'." He said under her breath. For the rest of the day Arnold sat back amd watched, as everyone said hateful things about Helga ; as she sat there and said nothing._

 _ **-FLASHBACK END-**_

Arnold was pulled out of his thought, as he noticed his blonde hair terminator walking into the Hillwood cemetery. Arnold was to curious to know what she was doing, that he didn't stop to question why; or how he ended up at the cemetery in the first place.

Arnold slowly walked into the cemetery, following his blonde friend. Arnold watched as Helga slowly made her way to Phoebe's grave. Arnold couldn't hear what she said at first, but she started to tense up and shack all at the same time. _Is she crying?..._ Arnold thought to himself, but that was all he could think before Helga began to yell at Phoebe's head stone.

"Why Phoebe?! What were you doing around my house that was so important that you had to die?! What about our promise? You said you were going to get stronger, that you would stay by my side! You lied to me! You left my and now I'm alone... You held me together... why Phoebe..? Our promise..." Helga yelled to the sky not caring if anyone could hear her.

But someone did hear, all Arnold could do was watch her. Then he remembered what Brainy said after Helga punched Gerald last week.

 _ **~SHORT FLASHBACK~**_

 _Brainy turn back towards Gerald who was still on the floor as he took out his inhaler and took a few puffs of air before speaking. "Helga maybe a bully..." Brainy had to stop and roll his eyes at that. He seen the real side of Helga the one only Phoebe, Arnold, and himself knew about."But Phoebe was like a sister to her... one she really did love. Just because you didn't tell Phoebe how you felt about her, doesn't mean you can take your pain out on Helga." With that Brainy left. Leaving everyone stun and deep in thought._

 _ **~END OF SHORT FLASHBACK~**_

Arnold noticed that the sky was starting to clear. He saw Helga looked up anger and sorrow showing clearly on her face. But then she looked down shaking more, then she hugged herslf.

Arnold sat there in awe as he watched Helga soaked from the rain and cry, but then she stopped. Arnold grew concerned, when he noticed her just... standing there. His breathing hitched once she fell to the ground, without a second thought; Arnold ran to her side.

"Helga?!" Arnold said worry in his voice. As he stood over her, Helga looked at him still in some sort of daze. "Phoebe...?" She said in a weak voice. Not taking his eyes off of her, Arnold gently picked her up. "Helga... are you okay?" Arnold asked softly. Yet he did not get a response back, she just looked at him before passing out.

Arnold heart stopped, he did not know what to do so he ran. Arnold would look at her every second or so, until something grabbed his attention. Arnold slowly came to a stop, and just looked at Helga. Her bow and dress were covered in mud, and her hear was down. _Her hair looks so soft..._ Arnold thought in awe. He noticed that after Phoebe died, Helga stopped wearing her hair up.

 _Sh-she look just like she did the day... we first met._ Arnold thought to himself. He was mesmerized by the blonde hair girl in his arms. _She looks so... peaceful, and she kinda... kinda looks pretty._ He continued , blushing slightly. Then he shocked his head harshly. "Helga... _pretty?! What an I thinking?!"_ Arnold said to no one.

He looked back at Helga, who was sleeping soundly in his arms. Arnold's face soften, as his eyes fell half lidded. "I have to hurry and get her to the Boarding House, before she gets sick." Arnold said as he began to run again. Not even paying attention to the fact, that Helga looked like a muddy Cecile.

When Arnold walked into the Boarding House, he breath a sigh of relief. Everyone was quiet, and not a boarder in site. Arnold walked into the kitchen were he knew his Grandparents were. He was right, Phil was sitting at the table; while Gertie was in the kitchen cooking _God_ _knows what!_ "Grandma, Grandpa." Arnold said calmly as t nit wake Helga up.

Phil and Gertie looked at Arnold and Helga in shock. Gertie then gave a worry looking Arnold a warm smile. "Arnold..." She said sweet. Arnold gave his Grandmother his full attention, it wasn't ever day she called him by his given name. "Tell us what happened, dear." Arnold nodded still not letting Helga go. "A few days ago Helga's best and only friend Phoebe died in a car accident, I was walking around and saw ger go into the cemetery. I... I um.. f-followed her and saw her talking to Phoebe's head stone... then... then she just passed out."

Arnold said, leaving out details about Helga yelling and crying.

Gertie smiled lovingly at the blonde hair girl in Arnold's arms. "Oh, Arnold. She's all wet, bring her here and I'll go get her changed up." Gertie said her smile that on a caring old lady. Arnold nodded walking over to his Grandmother to hand Helga off. Once in her arms, Gertie moved a piece of hair out of Helga's face. "I'll get some towls and change of clothes for her, and get her all fixed up." Gertie said, thinking out loud.

Still Arnold nodded, Arnold watched them go. Once Gertie and Helga left he sighed. "What's up Shortman, you worried?" Phil asked his Grandson. Arnold turned back around to face his Grandfather. "Grandpa... I-I have never seen Helga so... broken. Grandpa she... she was sobbing. Helga stood there asking Phoebe's head stone why she had to die!" Arnold exclaimed. He didn't know why, but Helga's pain felt like his own.

Phil gave Arnold a sad yet knowing smile. _How can he not know how much he loves her?_ Phil thought to himself. "Well Shortman... she did lose someone who was important to her." Phil told his Grandson calmly. Arnold nodded in understanding. "What should I do Grandpa?" Arnold asked in a desperate voice.

Phil looked Arnold dead in the eye, placing each of his hands on both of Arnold's shoulders. "If you want to help all you have to do is be there for her." Phil told his Grandson firmly. Arnold sat there confused. "But... HOW Grandpa?! And what if Helga doesn't want me there?!" Arnold said a little sad. Phil sighed. _He is so very dense..._ Phil thought to himself. "Arnold only you know how you can help, and as for if she pushes you away... well your smart you'll figure out something!" Phil exclaimed reassuringly.

With those words Arnold cheered right back up. "You're right Grandpa I'll go talk to her right now!" Arnold said rushing to his feet. Before Arnold disappeared up the stairs Phil called him back. "Yes, Grandpa?" Phil looked at him seriously.

"Never. Eat. _Raspberries!"_ He said jumping to his feet as well.

Arnold rolled his eyes and chuckled. "Okay, Grandpa." He said watching his Grandpa run into his, 'Office'.

Arnold rushed up stairs to his room. He knocked on the door gently before walking in, he blinked in surprise. Helga wasn't in there ad his Grandma was just standing there looking at his Skylight.

"Grandma, where is Helga?" Arnold wasn't sure, but he thought he say his Grandma jump a little, but she spun around ; and placed a big bright smile on her face. "Oh, Eleanor said she had to improve her defenses, for the Princess in the tower." Gertie said in an animated way she always said things. Arnold gave her a confused look, then shocked his head. "Never mind grandma, she must have left." Arnold said walking out of his room. _I really wanted to talk to her..._ Arnold thought to himself

* * *

 **A/N: So flippn' tired I have WAY to many summer projects, and why the HECK am I doing spring cleaning during summer?!**

 _ **Wait... don't answer that.**_ ***Sigh* I give myself a headache sometimes. -_-#)**

 _ **RR &F PLEASE**_


	7. Chapter 7: Won't Let Go P2

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Okay this could be a short chapter still don't know yet... *shrug* ON with the show!... story!... WHATEVER!**

 **DISCLAIMER:**

 _ **silence**_

 _ **Listen**_

 _ **I own nothing.**_

* * *

Chapter 7: Won't Let Go p2!

 _~Two weeks after the accident_

 _Four weeks after the hit~_

Arnold noticed many things. He noticed how people were starting to pull away from others, how some moved on; and how most became quiet. Everything and one began to calm down now that Helga was quiet. Honestly Arnold found that thing was starting to bore him. Arnold looked over to _his_ best friend, Gerald. Arnold noticed how he was more focused on his work. Every since Phoebe's death, Gerald and Arnold didn't hang out all that much.

"Gerald why are you so quiet?" Arnold asked not looking at his friend as they walked to school. Gerald keep walking. "Because I'm hurting." He said bluntly. Arnold was taken aback by that. He almost stopped walking, but he didn't. "I-I don't know what to say, Gerald." Arnold admitted softly. Gerald looked at him, breathing a sad smile. "That's because you can't, Man." Gerald told him.

"Gerald! It will get better it has to! Just loo-" **"STOP!"** Gerald yelled firmly. Arnold again was taken aback by him. Gerald looked down, his fist balled up by his sides. "Arnold, you could never understand this pain, it near impossible to find a brightside to this." Gerald said as he started to walk away. Arnold however stood there confused.

"Gerald I don't get this!" Arnold yelled confused. Gerald stopped walking for a moment, but he didn't turn around. "Arnold there's a saying. _'You are my other half_ _.'_ That means there are only you two, who will fit together like a puzzle pieces...perfectly. Some time if your lucky, you have someone out there that can replace that piece." Gerald stopped and looked up.

 _"_ Yet most of the time you can never find either pieces. You should count your blessings if you find yours _."_ Gerald finished. Then he fully turned around facing, Arnold. "Arnold. Some people are alone because, they lost one piece and could never find the other." Gerald looked down. "Or it was to late to find the other replacement piece. There is not brightside in this, Arnold." Gerald finished walking away.

"Gerald there's always a brightside." Arnold said running in front of him, causing Gerald to stop. Gerald looked down at the pavement as he gave a sigh. "Arnold... Did you know that, I told Phoebe I loved her?" Gerald said still looking down. Arnold was shocked, Gerald never told him that. "No." Arnold answered.

Gerald nodded. "After the Cheese festival last _year."_

 ** _~FLASHBACK~_**

 _It was some time around 11:30 at night when Phoebe and Gerald finally reached the Hyerdahi house hold. On the walk there they talked about silly things, every now and then flirt a little. Smiling, laught, even stayed silent a few times, just there next to one another. Both nine year old had to admit it was nice despite some craziness._

 _As they stood on Phoebe's stoop, they stood silent. Both parties not wanting to leave, Gerald looked Phoebe in the eye, her eyes sparkled in the street light. Gerald felt dizzy, but shocked it of he had to tell her. "P-Phoebe." Gerald stuttered nervously. "Y-Yes, Gerald?" Phoebe asked nervous as well. She had like liked Gerald for a very long time._

 _Gerald took a deep breath to calm himself, it worked slightly. "Phoebe I love you." Gerald said looking at her in the eyes. Phoebe gasped, blinked, then blushed. "Y-You... love me?" She asked shyly. Gerald took it as a good sigh, he smiled at her. "Yes, Phoebe. I love you... I-I have for a long time._

 _Phoebe blushed harder. "F... For how long.. For how long have you had such deep feelings for me?" She asked in a small voice. She was over the moon, but she wanted to know. Gerald looked down shyly. "Well I-I liked you liked you since pre-school. I-I knew I loved you since second grade, when my feelings only got stronger." Gerald finished a little flustered._

 _Phoebe smiled._ Just like how I felt!... _Phoebe thought to herself overjoyed. Gerald rubbed his arm nervously. "D-do you love me t- **TOOO**?!" Gerald started to ask, but was then tackled to the ground. Phoebe smiled brightly. "Yes! Yes I love you!" Phoebe smiled. Gerald beamed, he could not, nor did he try to stop himself from kissing her. At first Phoebe gasped, then she slowly began to return it._

 _The kiss was slow, soft, sweet, passionate, and pure. (A/N: normally if you read an 'Arnold and Helga' kiss scene, their kisses would be wild and crazy. Gerald and Phoebe lean more towards normal when it comes to coupling.) When they finally broke apart and stood up, they smiled at each other longingly. Phoebe sighed. "Gerald I love you... however." She said her face and voice turning serious._

 _"I think we should wait a little longer to do something. We are both still very young, so I don't think we should try anything just yet." Phoebe finished trying to hide how sad she was._ This is for the best! _She told herself. Gerald sighed and nodded in understanding. "I think your right, babe. But how long do I have to wait for my, foxy lady." Gerald asked throwing Phoebe a wink._

 _Phoebe giggled and blushed. "Well I would say that I you still felt the same.. the safe start would be sixth grade? But could you wait that long?" She asked her eyes kinda sad. Gerald took her hand in his own looking at her seriously. "Phoebe, for you I would wait forever and a day." Gerald said gazing in her eyes lovingly. Phoebe's face softened, as she smiled at him just as lovingly._

 _"And I would wait for you too, Gerald." She said back. The two nine year old kids stood there looking at each other, until Gerald leaned in to give Phoebe one last loving kiss. Phoebe melted as she returned the kiss. The two slowly pulled away, and gave each other a hug. "Night, Phoebe!"Gerald said running off. Phoebe waved after him. "Sweet dreams!" She called after him._

 _Gerald ran with a big smile on his face._ I will wait for you, Phoebe! _Gerald thought to himself._

 _ **~END FLASHBACK~**_

Arnold looked at his friend amazed. "G-Gerald... I-I am sorry, man." Arnold said looking down. Gerald sighed as he placed his hand on Arnold's shoulder. "It's okay, buddy." Gerald said trying to sound reassuring. Arnold sighed as they began to walk again. "I wish I could understand you... your pain..but-but I can't and I don't." Arnold said looking down, he felt like he failed his best friend.

Gerald looked at Arnold. "Someday you will... maybe, if not. Hey count yourself lucky." Gerald said trying to lighten the mood.

It didn't...

"Gerald! Stop trying to lighten the situation?!" Arnold asked still walking. Gerald shrugged. "I can't help it, these last four weeks have been so depressing!" Gerald exclaimed with a sigh. "Arnold you weren't close to, Phoebe. I don't think you could ever understand this pain." Arnold sighed knowing, Gerald was right.

Arnold mind wandered back to Helga. _She been acting strange lately..._ Arnold thought to himself. He noticed that she changed her wardrobe... a lot. Helga no longer wore her pink jumper, one day she came to school and it looked like it had something red stained to it. Now that Arnold thought about it. The jumper kinda looked ripped, a teacher asked Helga about it. She just shrugged and walked away, however the next day she came to school wearing jeans, black shirts, and jackets.

Arnold watched as Helga began to pull away. He didn't want that, he wanted to take Helga in his arms hold her, comfort her, be her shoulder to cry on. He knew she was hurting, at school when ever he tried to talk to her she would walk the other way; or ignore him. Arnold didn't know why, but when she did that. It felt like a knife stabbed him in the heart.

He just wanted to..to _lov- **"OOF!"**_ Speak of the Devil.

Arnold quickly sat up ready to help Helga to her feet. "I'm sorry, Helga." Arnold said sincerely. He held his hand out, but Helga didn't move, she just sat there. _She's being quiet again... but this is different._ Arnold thought to himself, watching her. "Helga?" He asked concern in his voice. Helga's head snapped back up. Arnold could see the fear in her eyes as they darted from him, to Gerald. Arnold knew he looked just as confused as he felt, when she jumped up and ran off.

Arnold turned his gaze towards Gerald. Gerald only sighed, he then said something that threw Arnold off guard. "I bet this is hurting her more, then it is me." He said as he started his walk to school again, Arnold stood there.

 _What just happened?_ Arnold asked feeling angry. The people he cared about are hurting, and he doesn't know what to do! He hated not being able to help he felt so... so useless! And it ticked him off to no end! Arnold didn't know how to take this.

 _ **~FLASHBACK~**_

 _Phil looked Arnold dead in the eye, placing each of his hands on both of Arnold's shoulders. "If you want to help all you have to do is be there for her." Phil told his Grandson firmly. Arnold sat there confused. "But... HOW Grandpa?! And what if Helga doesn't want me there?!" Arnold said a little sad. Phil sighed._ He is so very dense... _Phil thought to himself. "Arnold only you know how you can help, and as for if she pushes you away... well your smart you'll figure out something!" Phil exclaimed reassuringly_.

 _ **~END FLASHBACK~**_

Arnold nodded then looked up, determination written on his face. _There's always a bright side, I have to believe that..._ Arnold thought to himself running to get to his friends side. Arnold was going to help the ones he cared for. _I have to have faith in myself! I can do it..._ Arnold said trying to gave himself a pep talk.

"I will make things better."

* * *

 **A/N: Did I make Arnold sound insensitive? If so, sorry. That's totally my bad! Also heads up, an idea hit my like a ton of bricks. So this is a before hand apology.**

 **Hey here's a riddle I made up! Do you think you can answer it?**

 **I am cold,**

 **I am warm,**

 **I am big,**

 **I am light,**

 **I am heavy.**

 **What am I?**

 _ **RR &F! Or just leave an answer.**_


	8. Chapter 8 Won't Let Go P3

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Huh I'm sad no one wanted to answer my riddle... awe. Anyhow this is going to take place at school and the pier. _enjoy! Cuz it is looong! XD_**

 **DISCLAIMER: Oh come on! The word _DISCLAIMER_ should say it all, _Doi!_**

* * *

 **Chapter 8:** Won't Let Go P3

 _~Two weeks, later after The Hit._

 _Four weeks, later after the accident.~_

Arnold didn't pay any attention to anyone, he was to wrapped up in his own thoughts to truly care. Ever now and then he did take notes, he would look at Gerald. He would even steal a glance from Helga. It was only first period, and Arnold already wanted the day over with. Early that morning Arnold did stopped Helga in the hall to try to talk to her. He gave a long sigh at how his little talked ended.

...

 _ **~FLASHBACK~**_

 _Arnold ran down the hall after he said he would see Gerald second period. "Helga!" Arnold called out. Arnold saw her twitch but she keep walking... she moved a little faster even. "Helga!" Arnold called out again. Helga shoulders fell in defeat. "What do you want, Football head." Arnold knew something was wrong. The way she said that insult, it almost sound like a pet name._

If only she would say it like that more often... _Arnold thought, with his half lidded goofy grin. He then internally gasped at the thought._ It's not like, I like her like her! I-I mean I don't like the nickname! Wait it's not a nickname! I... I-it's- _**"Hey Arnold!"** Arnold snapped out of his internal rant to see Helga giving him an annoyed glare. She almost looks like her old self... almost. "Yes. I'm sorry, Helga. I was just thinking..." Arnold rubbed the back of his neck._

 _"Uh...Hel-Helga I-I uh... was wondering if you wanted to hang out with me and Gerald after school?" Arnold asked hopefully._ Why am I so nervous?! I mean this is just Helga! Stop acting crazy!

He... He wants to hhangout with me?! _Helga thought in shock yet hopful too._ Arnold you... you really do care! _Helga was about to smile for the first time, in a while. Yet sorrow filled her face as Miriam's voice swirled in her head._

 ** _"That boy will never love such an ugly bitch like you._ "**

He will never love me... this is only pity. He even need Gerald to be there to have a distraction. He doesn't want to deal with me... _Helga thought to herself._

 _Arnold saw Helga's face go from shock to sorrow, she gave a tired sigh. "Arnold I don't want your pity." Arnold shocked his head harshly. "Helga I would never pity you! I just wanted to help-" Helga pushed him. **"** **ARNOLD! I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP,JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"** Even though she yelled, Arnold heard her voice braking. Everyone stopped, and looked at the two blondes. Arnold looked at her confused. He reached out his hand to touch her shoulder, he only grazed her before she jumped back in fear. Arnold could see that fear in her eyes. _

Is she scared of me... did I do something wrong? _"Helga?" Arnold asked in a soft voice. Helga looked at the kids around them. She turned fear into fake anger, she then pushed Arnold to the ground. "Who said you could touch me, Football head?!" She yelled before walking away. Arnold knew it was an act, he knew she was hurting._ Why did she have to do this stuff so much? She always hide stuff from me _... Arnold thought to himself looking down._

 ** _"D... did you just say, you LOVED me?!"_**

 ** _"What are you, deaf?! You heard me pal! I LOVE YOU!"_**

 _Arnold shocked that thought away, he noticed a hand was in his face offerings to help him up. Arnold looked up to see. "Oh. Hey, Lila." Arnold said politely. Lila was Arnold's **old** crush, he realized after Future Tech Industry almost took over the naberhood. Arnold didn't really have feelings for Lila, they kinda... disappeared. _It had nothing to do with, **HELGA**! _Lila gave Arnold a sad smiled. "Hey, Arnold. I am ever so sorry, Helga did that." She said sweetly, she knew how much Phoebe meant to Helga. She also knew that Helga loved Arnold and that she only had him left._

 _Arnold sighed. "I don't know why she does that." Lila shocked her head. "You are just oh so dense, Arnold." Lila whispered as Arnold was walking away. He must have heard her because, Arnold turned around a puzzled expression on his face. "What do you mean by that, Lila?" Arnold asked her suspiciously. Lila gave a nervous chuckle. "Oh I am ever so sure I have no clue what you're talking about!" She said cheerfully, however Arnold wasn't buying it. "Lila..." As if on cue the bell rang._

 _Lila smiled brightly and sighed in relief. "Oh look at that! Sorry Arnold, but I am ever so certain I have to go!" With that Lila ran off before Arnold could question her any further. "See you in third period, Arnold." Lila called. That's right Lila and everyone else had third period with Arnold. "That means I can talk to, Helga." Arnold observed as he made his way to second period._

 ** _-END FLASHBACK-_**

It felt like forever before third period finally came. Arnold like everyone else was the first to come in before Mr. Simmons. No one questioned why he moved to fifth grade, mostly because it was a relief to have him. When Helga walked into the room everyone turned to look at her. Helga noticed and growled.

When she sat down, Helga still felt everyone looking at her... she didn't like it. Helga growled again. "What are you chuckleheads looking at!" Helga said with a snarl. "Helga what's with your new look." Sid asked. "Yeah you look like a girl!" Herald yelled. Arnold was taken aback. _Had_ _no one noticed she had that same look for the past week!_

Helga gave a tired sigh, and rolled her eyes. "I will do what ever the hell I want, got it?!" Everyone was taken aback, and turned around. Arnold however, had to stop himself from laughing. "Well I never." He heard Rhonda say under her breath, again Helga rolled her eyes. Right on time, Mr. Simmons walked into the room. "Hello class!" He said happily. He noticed the angry and worried looks on his students faces. "Um...What's wrong?" He asked the class kindly.

"Helga is being really rude." Rhonda said, Arnold rolled his eye. Mr. Simmons smiled politely at Helga. "Helga will you please apologize to your class." Helga didn't have the will to fight, she just stood up her eyes dead, and her voice tired and sore. Arnold frowned at that, he knew just by looking at her she was hurting. "I apologize for being rude." She said sitting back down. Arnold saw Mr. Simmons frowned as well."Hel-" was cut off by the sound of Rhonda screaming in disguise. Arnold turned around to see Curly trying to kiss Rhonda on the lips. "Curly cut it out or I will have to call your mother." Mr. Simmons said in warning tone.

Curly reluctantly sat down, sighed. "Okay class lets get started!" He said. Arnold was curious to know what he was going to say to Helga.

...

By the time poetry time roll around, Arnold was beyond happy that meant it was almost time to go. It also means that he could try talking to Helga again.

"Okay class it poetry time, but first I would like to read a poem and of course it's by Anonymous." Mr. Simmon said with a smile. Arnold like Anonymous poems, he couldn't write but the poems that person made was so... powerful. As Mr. Simmons read, Arnold noticed that this poem unlike the others by Anonymous. Was talking about the pain that person was going through. A pain that they force themselves to hide.

Arnold didn't know why, but he turned around to look at Helga. He noticed how she was shocking slightly, at first he was sad to say he thought she was laughing. Yet when he looked closer, he could see that she had a pained look on her face. People think that Arnold is dense, at times he is. Yet anyone without a brain could see this was Helga's poem. Arnold eyes widen. _So she does write poetry!_

 _ **"Who else writes volumes upon volumes of poetry dedicated to you!"**_

Arnold blushed at the thought. Everthing Helga said on the FTi building was not the 'Heat Of The Moment' thing. Arnold shocked the thought away, they could talk about it later. _I have to get Helga to talk to me._ Arnold thought determinedly.

When Mr. Simmons was done reading, Arnold watched as everyone was crying silently. _Even Herold..._ Arnold thought amused. "Oh Anonymous! Who has hurt you so badly?!" Rhonda asked dramatically, Helga gave a tired chuckle. Arnold looked at Helga, then at Rhonda. _If only she knew._ He signed. Rhonda must have heard Helga's laugh because she sent her a dirty look. "And _what!_ is so funny, Pataki?!" Rhonda asked angrily. That only made Helga chuckle more.

Rhonda looked outraged. "You know what Helga I felt bad for you, since Phoebe died and all! However if anyone should feel like they could not be loved, it is you!" Everyone fell silence, some agreeing with Rhonda. Arnold looked at Rhonda with a scowl, but he had to respect Helga and keep quiet. For just a second he saw the flash of pure pain and sorrow in her eyes.

It was only a second but he saw it, but then she covered that pain with anger like she always did. "Psh! Whatever like I would want some idiotic boy to fall for me!" Helga said with a huff. Rhonda snarled. "Good because who would fall for someone as ugly as you?!" Rhonda yelled. Again, Arnold saw the flash of pain in he was not sure if he saw it the first time, but the second time confirmed it for Arnold. Helga was hiding her pain.

...

After the bell rang Rhonda rushed out of the classroom, Arnold shrugged it off as he made his way to Gerald. Arnold smiled as he made his way to his friends desk. "Hey, Gerald!" Arnold said brightly. Gerald gave his friend a weak smile. "Hey, Arnold. What's up, Man?" Gerald held out his hand, Arnold smiled at the gesture. "Do you want to come over and hangout at the Boarding House?" Arnold asked as they did their signature handshake.

Gerald smiled, he knew his friend was trying to ease the pain. He had to appreciate his efforts, Gerald gave an amused sigh at the site of his friends hopful face. Gerald then chuckled, shaking his head." Sure, man. I'll come over around six." Arnold raised an eyebrow. Gerald just shrugged. "I'm staying after school for a little, plus I need to eat dinner. You know there's no telling if I can eat at your place." Gerald said with a grin.

Arnold chuckled he was glad to see his friend so happy, to see his friend feel better. "Whatever you say, that just mean I can take care of something." Arnold said with a smile. Gerald too, raised an eyebrow. Then he gave Arnold a sad smile, just like the one Lila gave him. "Is Arnold the Good Samaritan, wishing to help the wicked witch of the class." He said knowingly. Arnold sighed. "Gerald. You and I both know she's hurting."

Arnold said seriously. "I-I have to help her! She..." Gerald raised his hand. "Say no more man, please. I know you have to help her, it's just ARNOLD'S thing." He stopped and rolled his eye. "Besides, if I stopped you I wouldn't hear the end of it." Gerald smiled as he walked away. "See you later man!" Gerald called, as he waved not looking back. Arnold smiled. "See you later Gerald!" Arnold called after his friend.

...

Arnold quickly ran to reach Helge, he saw lucky that he saw her at the school entrance. He was about to call after her when...

 _ **SPLASH!**_

Arnold stood there in shock, before him was Helga G Pataki drenched in water. Arnold could hear two sixth graders laughing at the deed they done. "We just wanted to show the world your true ugly colors." One of the sixth graders said, both girls walked away laughing at Helga. When they were gone Arnold started making his way towards her.

"Helga..." Arnold called softly, Helga gasped. "Helga is something wrong?" Arnold cringed at his question. _She's soaking wet! And you asked 'Is something wrong?!'_ Arnold internally scolded himself. He then grew concerned when Helga didn't answer him, not even with her sarcasm. He gently grabbed Helga by her wrist, only to have her scream in pain. Arnold quickly pulled back his hand.

"Helga what's wrong?!" Arnold turned Helga around so that she was facing him. Arnold quickly used his left hand to cover his mouth as he gasped. He could see a black and blue hand print on Helga'scheek, she had a black eye, and if he looked closer. He could see hand prints around her neck. However right now he was focused on her face.

"Oh my gosh Helga. Your face." Arnold eyes widen. _snap! that came out wrong!_ He thought to himself as he saw that same flash of pain and sorrow in her eyes. But this time there as something else... _heartbreak._ Helga quickly pulled away and ran. "Helga!" Arnold called after her, as he started running as well.

 _You idiot! People were talking about her all day and you said something so... STUPID!_ Arnold knew he had to reach Helga, something was telling him if he didn't hurry. Something very bad would happen. Arnold round the corner to see Helga on the ground in mud. "Helga!" Arnold thought the worst, as panic filled his thoughts.

Yet his panic turned to relief when he saw Helga turn around, yet the relief was short lived. Helga got up in the matter of seconds, and ran faster then before. Arnold ran faster, but when he turned the corner... Helga was gone. "Dang it." Arnold stopped running, and began to pace on the sidewalk. _Okay calm down! If I were Helga, where would I go?_ Arnold was beyond terrified. He had a nagging feeling something was off.

 _Where would Helga go?!_ Arnold started to pull at his tuffs of hair. He knew he looked like a mad man, but fear and worry were holding his heart in their hands. _Why did I have to say something so STUPID... just completely **STUPID**! _ Arnold felt tears prick at his eyes, but he brushed them away quickly. He stopped pacing and took a deep breath. "The pier... the pier!" Arnold exclaimed hopefully. _The last time Helga and I were down we went to the peir. M-maybe she's there now!_ Arnold rushed off to the pier, hoping that Helga was okay.

...

When Arnold made it to the pier he nearly exploded with relief when he saw Helga sitting at the edge of the pier. He was still at the edge of the food court, but he knew it was Helga by the big pink bow. He decided to slow down and walk. Arnold wasn't sure, but it seemed like Helga was talking. At least it looked like her lips were moving Helga looked dazed.

Arnold was at the first flight of steps before he could hear Helga soft... _broken_ voice.

"Who is this 'we'? Is it Phoebe, she there too?" Helga asked hope clear in her voice. _Who is she talking to?_ Arnold asked _._ He stopped walking and hide behind one of the pole watching he _r. I don't think she knows I'm here._

Arnold's breath got caught in his trough, as Helga walked to the edge of the pier; and looked over. He started walking carefully, clearly she was about to do something _drastic._ Arnold had to be quiet, and stop her.

Arnold started to walk faster, trying to stay light on his feet. Helga slowly got down on her knees, then layed down on her stomach her arms over the pier's edge. Arnold's heart was pounding like crazy. _What is she doin?!_ Arnold screamed at himself, unaware of the tears flowing from his eyes. " **Helga!** " Arnold yelled

Helga fell into the water, and Arnold's Heart nearly stopped. Arnold made it to the edge of the pier, he stopped and fell to his knees and cried. He looked up determination locked on his face. _NO! I can't let this happen... I can't lose her! I won't!_ Arnold stood to his feet took a deep breath and dived into the water.

* * *

 **A/N: The next chapter is when my idea comes to play so... yeah... Also here's a hint to my riddle. ~Everyone has one.~**

 **I hope the chapter is to your liking Everclear 70**

 **Also Nairobi-Harper please update soon! X3.**


	9. Chapter 9: Last Breath

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Do I have one?... yes! This is both Helga and Arnold's POV. At the end it will show Gerald's POV for a short time. So** _ **enjoy! P.S I wanted to update yesterday, but I lost the document saving it . So I stayed up all night re-writing it, I love you guys & gals that much! X3 **_

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own HEY ARNOLD!... it hurts to say that *sniff sniff* 8_8**

* * *

 **Chapter 9** : Last Breath?

 **Helga's POV**

 _Was that Arnold?... no. He wouldn't save me... I'm not worth saving..._ Helga thought as she opened her eyes. _A_ _m I dead?..._ Helga felt heavy and at the same time... weightless. She wish she could move, but her body won't let her. She thought this would be her chance at freedom, yet she still feel empty. She was supposed to see Phoebe, yet she could not see through this thick blue and black fog. So she was just stuck there laying on the ground.

 _I want to see, Phoebe._ Helga thought as a tear rolled down my cheek. **"She's here Helga."** That soft voice she heard at the pier said. _Where is she! Please I-I want to see, Phoebe!_ Helga pleaded tears flowing freely. _**"Helga?"**_ She knew that voice. Helga wish I could get up, she wish she could move. Helga wanted nothing more to hug her tell her how sorry she was for always using her.

Helga silently cried harder, because she could not. Helga could not move, talk, or anything. All she could do is lay here ad sob, like a fucking baby! As Helga cried she felt a dainty hand lightly grab her chin. Helga's head was forced to turn, and her sad deep blue eyes meet calm golden brown ones. **"Don't cry, Helga."** The woman from the pier said, a soft loving smile on her face. Helga noticed her skin was sun kissed, and her hair was cut in a bob style, and she was wearing a white dress.

If Helga was like her old self, she would laugh at this cliche.

The woman gently wiped the tears from Helga's eyes. **"Stand up,** **Helga."** She sais sweetly. Helga wanted to, but her legs felt so heavy. Helga gave a tired whimper, the lady then looked at her with a smile. **"I guess it was foolish of me to try to be your motivation."** Her voice was so soft and soothing. While she was still holding Helga, the mysterious woman threw a smile over her shoulder.

Then there was a calming, almost timid light coming from behind her. Helga tried to see who it was, she had an idea; but she didn't want to get her hopes up. Helga felt a small soft hand gently grab her own, it was cold and warm too. Helga looked up and nearly broke out in tears or was gonna laugh, maybe both. _S_ _he looked like a cliche too_...

 _"Phoebe.."_

* * *

 **Arnold's POV**

As Arnold dived into the water he was hit with how cold it was. Arnold could barely see, but he knew he had to save Helga. After a few seconds his body was starting to go limp from the cold water, and his lungs where burning. Yet Arnold forced himself to swim deeper. A little while longer, and Arnold was about to turn around, when he spotted something golden yellow floating in the water.

Arnold heart started to beat faster, he completely forgot his need for air. Arnold swam over to the floating yellow trail, _Helga!_ he thought to himself. Panic filled Arnold's being, as he noticed no air bubbles were coming from Helga's floating body. Arnold quickly grabbed her hand and pulled her to shore.

* * *

 **Helga's POV**

Phoebe stood before Helga with a gentle smile and tears pricing the corner of her eyes. **"Hello, Helga."** Phoebe said, her voice a mere echo. The lady from the pier moved, so that Phoebe could grabbed both of Helga's hands. Helga was to shocked to say anything. Phoebe looked at Helga's legs, her face still soft. **"You have to stand up."** Phoebe said not looking up.

Helga said nothing, just looked down at her legs as well. When Phoebe stood up, she pulled Helga up with her. Helga slowly, like a baby deer trying to walk for the first time. Wobbled to her feet, once she was steady. Helga continued to looked down at her feet, unsure of what to say. **"Helga..."** Phoebe said. Helga looked up finding her voice. _"Phoebe I-"_

 _ **SMACK!**_

It happened so fast, and it stung so badly. Helga still surprised by what happened, could only raise a hand to where Phoebe slapped her. Helga finally came out of her state of shock, and looked at Phoebe with a fire she thought was long forgotten, in her eyes. _"Phoebe! What the Hell! That hurts!"_ Helga yelled, but was surprised to see Phoebe stand her ground. If anything she looked more angry.

 **"Do NOT give me that _SHIT,_ Pataki! What the hell are you doing here?!" **Phoebe yelled back. Helga was dumbfounded, little shy Phoebe not only slapped her, she yelled, and even cussed. Helga started shaking with sadness and anger. Phoebe soften seeing Helga's pain, she maybe mad, but Helga was her best friend.

 **"Helga..."** The way Phoebe said her name, Helga fell to her knees and cried. Phoebe fell to her knees as well, and pulled Helga into a strong hug. _"Phoebe you left!... a-and when you d-d-did ever.. everything got w-worse!"_ Helga managed to get out before her sobs took her. Phoebe pulled her tighter, tears of her own in her eyes. Helga was a strong girl, so seeing her cry would make anyone sad.

 **"Helga... tell me what happened."**

* * *

 **Arnold's POV**

Back at the shore, Arnold tried to stay calm but it was really hard. Arnold placed his ear above Helga's heart, it was silent. Arnold grew a little panic, he took a derp breath and gave Helga CPR. Then he again placed his ear on Helga's heart. Still...nothing, Arnold repeated the process three times before Helga cough up the water.

"Helga!" Arnold said happily. Tears of joy forming in his eyes, she was okay. Helga looked at Arnold weakly, still in her daze. "Arnold..." Helga managed to get out, before he hugged her. "Please don't ever leave me again. I am so sorry, Helga!" Arnold hugged her tighter. He started to cry at the thought of Helga dying. As Arnold held Helga in his arms, he noticed she felt limp. "Helga...?" Arnold said looking up. Helga was unconscious once again.

"Helga!" Arnold said frantically. "Kimba!" A voice said from behind Arnold and Helga. Arnold turned around to see Gertie and Phil in the Packard. "Grandma, Grandpa! How did you find me?" Arnold asked, as Gertie rushed to his side. She looked at Helga, motherly concern shining on her face. "No time for that! We have to get Elinor to a doctor fast." She said. Taking Helga to the Packar with Arnold in tow.

* * *

 **Helga's POV**

 _"Arnold...?"_ Helga said softly. Phoebe looked at Helga seriously, she knew it was time for Helga to go back.

 **"Helga... you need to go home."** Phoebe said firmly.

Helga looked at her like she was felt betrayed. _"No! Go home only to have Bob beat me! Go home so that Miriam could break my soul! Go home to a place where I have no one! "_ Helga said feeling hurt by her best friend's words, tears pricing her eyes. Man! How she was tired of crying, but after holdimg it in for so long.. _ **. Does Phoebe not want me here? Does she not care anymore?...**_ Helga thought to herself, tears rolling.

Phoebe sighed sadly, taking Helga's hands she looked her in the eyes. Phoebe's smile was sad, yet her eyes were warm. **"Helga... you won't be alone. You'll have Arnold... He needs you-"**

 _"But I need you."_ Helga said seriously, her face grim with sadness.

* * *

 **Arnold's POV**

Gertie, Phil, and Arnold all sat in the waiting room at 5:35, wishing the Doctor would hurry up. Arnold keep tapping his foot, failing to calm his nerves. He had never been so scared of losing someone, his heart hurt just think about Helga being here. He wanted to hold her, hear her call him Football Head.

Arnold looked down, tears rolling down his cheeks. Phil and Gertie looked at their Grandson, Gertie placed a reassuring hand on Arnold's shoulder. "Arnold it's okay. Helga is a fighter, I promise you she'll be alright." Gertie said. She knew Helga would be okay... at least she hoped. Arnold shocked his head.

"Grandma you don't understand. I-I knew she was hurting and... and I did nothing." Arnold saidcrying. Gertie hugged her Grandson, she did not like seeing Arnold so sad. "You must really care about, Helga. Huh, Arnold?" She asked with a knowing half lidded smile. Arnold looked down for a second, then back at his Grandma. "Yes, Grandma I do. I think... I think that I lo-"

"Is anyone here to see Miss Pataki?" A Doctor said. Arnold jumped up, forgetting his talk just as fast. "Yes, my family and I are here for her." The Doctor sadly. "Are you people her family?" He asked. Arnold shocked his head. "No sir, but she's my friend." The Doctor gave a sad sigh. Hearing that Arnold knew something was wrong.

"I-is everything okay?" Arnold asked in a shaky voice. The Doctor looked down not wanting to see the pain in Arnold's eyes. "It looked like Miss Pataki was malnourished, the lose of air from drowning, and stress..." The Doctor trailed off. Phil grew angry from the Man's hesitation. "Well spit it out what's wrong!?" Again the Doctor sighed.

"Miss Pataki has slipped into a mild coma."

* * *

 **Gerald's POV**

It was 5:30 when Gerald left his house to go to Arnold's. He had to admit he really appreciated Arnold for trying to take his mind off of things. "Man, I hope this works." Gerald said as he watched his feet walk. He didn't want to think about the pain of losing someone he cared about. Even if it was only for a little, he wanted to hangout with Arnold like old times.

Against Gerald's better judgment he allowed he's mind to think about the one person he tried to forget.

 _ **~FLASHBACK~**_

 _~A week before the accident~_

 _Gerald sat on the step of P.S 118 staring at the clouds that floated by. He was waiting for Phoebe to come out so that they could go on one of their 'NOT' dates. As if on cue Phoebe came out the building holding a stack of books. She was so focus on the books not falling she wobbled as she walked._

 _Gerald chuckled under his breath as he watched her. "Here, Phoebe. Let me help." Gerald said trying to sound cool. Phoebe blushed as Gerald took the books from her. "Thank you, Gerald. That's was a very gentlemanly thing to do." Phoebe said with an adoring smile as she fluttered her eye lashes. Gerald chuckled again as he did a little bow. "Only the best for my foxy lady."_

 _Gerald said as he tossed in a wink. Phoebe laughed softly shaking her head at Gerald. "Well you deserve a reward for such a thing kind sir." Phoebe said with a coy smile. Gerald grinned and raised an eyebrow. "And just, WHAT does the lady, have in mind?" He asked._

 _Phoebe started walking a cunning smile playing with her lips. "Well we could go to the movies? I heard this movie called **'Case 93'** is finally out." Phoebe said hopefully. To her delight Gerald wanted to see it too. "You mean the one with that guy from CPS and that creepy boy that killed his parents that tried to kill him?!" Gerald asked excitedly. Phoebe nodded. "Yeah I like a good suspense movie."_

 _Phoebe said with a smile. Gerald finally caught up with Phoebe, and looped their arms. "Well lets go then. Then later we can get a burger or something?" Gerald asked with a cool shrug, Phoebe smiled up at Gerald shyly. "I'd love to, Gerald." Phoebe said sincerely. Then her smile turned into a smirk. "As long as you paying." She said playfully. Gerald pouting face was just as playful._

 _"Do I have to?" Gerald asked playfully. Phoebe gave him a half lidded stare, then she shrugged nonchalantly. "I mean I don't have to go." She said looking up over the rim of her glasses. Gerald gave a good natured sigh, and smiled. "I think Helga is rubbing off on you." Gerald said with a chuckle. Phoebe's eyes sparkled as she smiled._

 _"No... she's just keeping her promise." She said turning her gaze towards the pavement. Gerald looked at her confused. "What do you mean?" He asked. Phoebe shocked her head, and gave him a big smile. "It's a 'best friend' thing." She said sweetly. Gerald smiled back, then sighed in defeat. "Fine, let's just go have fun." Phoebe giggled._

 _Most the walk they talked about meaningless things. School, classes, their best friends, simple thing. Just enjoying each other's just being there. Finally the rest of the way was spent in a comfortable silence, as the two ten year olds walked to their **'NOT DATE.'** Both thinking how they liked being with the other._

 ** _~END FLASHBACK~_**

Gerald to lost in his own memories, to see the dark shadow that loomed over him. Then it was as if time slowed down, and Gerald was suddenly thrown into a movie.

The man snaked right arm around Gerald's torsos, and used his left hand to cover Gerald's mouth. So only Gerald's muffled cries for help could be heard, as he and the figure disappeared into the shadows of the night.

* * *

 **A/N: O.o Yes I got Gerald kidnapped... but it's for a good reason! Anyways in the next chapter you finally get what you always wanted The J.A.M. a.k.a Number i.**

 _ **RR &F **_


	10. Chapter 10: To Love, To Protect

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Hello loves! I think this will be one of my longer chapters. This mostly be Helga's and Arnold's POV. Around the end, you'll see what's up with Gerald. (DARK ARNOLD ALERT!)**

 **DISCLAIMER: Me and Hey Arnold are not together... well not in real life anyways.**

* * *

 **Chapter 10: To Love, To Protect, To let Go? P1**

 **Arnold's POV Third Person**

Arnold sat by Helga's bedside, it's only been ten minutes since they found out Helga was slipping away. Yet it felt like hours since they've been here. Phil and Gertie looked at their grandson with worried expression on their faces. Arnold hasn't said a thing since the Doctor told them about Helga's coma. They knew he felt guilty, they wanted to cry for the girl that they knew loved him, and the girl they loved themselves.

The Doctor walked into the gloomy room, his eyes down cast. He felt bad for the girl in the bed. "I am about to notify The Patakis that their daughter is in the hospital." Arnold scoffed, surprising his Grandparents. The Doctor raised an eyebrow, "Yes?" He asked. Arnold shocked his head. He knew it wasn't right to take his anger out on anyone else. "Sorry, Sir. I guess I'm just a little mad." The Doctor nodded. "I'll go notify her Parents at once." Arnold didn't know, but the thought of Helga's parents knowing that Helga was in the hospital, made Arnold uneasy.

"I understand son. It's heard to be in a situation like this, especially when it's someone you love." The Doctor said before he left. Arnold didn't know what to think, his heart still ached so much. _But does that mean I love her... love._ Arnold thought to himself.

"She told me she loves me..." Phil and Gertie snapped their heads up at Arnold's voice. "What was that, Shortman?" Phil asked still holding his wife. Arnold looked at them, his eyes looking a little... hollow. "Helga told me she loved me, when we were saving the neighborhood. Gerald and I, in truth we would have failed if it wasn't for Helga." Arnold said his eyes down cast.

Arnold gently grabbed Helga's hand, Arnold has never cried before... _never._ But seeing Helga like this broke his heart. _Is this how Gerald felt when he found out Phoebe died?_ Arnold asked himself, but he didn't love Helga, right? _Helga... you've done so much for me, yet I wasn't there for you... I wasn't there for you, when you needed me the most._

Arnold rubbed his thumb over Helga's hand softly. What he would give just to hear her call him Football Head again. He turned his tired gaze towards Helga's face, she looked so broken, then it hit him. Arnold let out another gasp and jumped to his feet, causing Phil and Gertie to jump to their feet as well. "What's wrong, Shortman?!" Phil asked.

Instead of answering his question Arnold rushed out of the room. Phil was about to call after him when he heard Gertie gasp behind him. "Gertie what's wrong?!" Phil asked as he turned around. Gertie was standing by Helga's bedside holding her arm pulling up it's sleeve. Phil walked over to her side. "Gertie what are you do-" The words died before he finished.

Helga had a palm prints around her neck and one on her face and a black eye. Gertie moved so that Phil could also see the small cuts on her upper arms. Both of the old 81 year old couple were filled with pure white rage. They knew the Patakis were not very nice but this... hurting you child was barbaric.

...

Arnold ran through the halls of the hospital trying to find the Doctor before he called the Patakis to stop him... to warn what they did to Helga. Be the time the Arnold finally saw him, the Doctor just hung up the phone. "Did you just call the Patakis?!" Arnold asked in a rushed voice. The Doctor turned around and smiled kindly at the young boy. "Yes I did, they said they would be here in thirty minutes." He said ignorant to the danger he just put the little girl in.

Arnold whole body went pale, and fear, worry, and something else that was directed at Helga... FOR Helga, held Arnold's heart tight. The Doctor noticed and allowed himself to look confused at the little boys reaction. "Is something wrong kid?" He asked. Arnold felt something snap in him at the question, he knew the Doctor didn't know what he did was wrong. He knew thar, but he was really angry.

Arnold pushed the Doctor forceful against his desk, and spoke in a low voice. Because Arnold was hit with the realization that... THIS GUY WAS TREATING HER! "How the **HELL** did you _**not** _ see the palm prints on her?" Arnold asked in a dangerously low voice his body was seething with pure rage. The Doctor was scared, and it was sad because this kid was _ten,_ and only reach his _pocket_! "W-what palm prints?!" He asked truly confused.

His confusion only made Arnold even more angry. Arnold slammed the Doctor, against his desk, causing the Doctor to gasp in shock. "The ones that cover ger face and neck." He said through his teeth. Arnold may not have seen thecl cuts, but he wasn't stupid. The Doctor was shaking, he never knew someone could be so scary... be never knew a _kid_ could be THIS scary. And he was even more horrified, to think about what he, himself had just done. Arnold pushed the Doctor down and rushed to the phone.

"Hello police... I have reason to fear for my friends life. She's in the hospital right now, and she has bruises, and palm prints on her. I think she's being abused at home." Arnold said calmly, even though he knew this was serious. His palms where sweaty with fear, and worry. Big Bob Pataki was a very bad man, who knows what he could do to them. The police said they would be there in ten minutes. And the Patakis said they would be here in thirty, that gave them time.

Arnold rushed back to Helga's hospital room. Something in him was telling him to stay by her side, and this time he would. _I promise to protect you this time Helga, I won't let anyone hurt you._ Arnold thought determinedly.

* * *

 **Helga's POV**

Helga stood in front of her best friend, her eye teary, and her fist balled up.

 _"Phoebe I need you... your my best friend. If I had to go do some crazy 'my love for Arnold is a secret' mission. You would always be there for me. When I felt sad, and lashed out... y-you would take it... all for me. Phoebe I-I can't be there alone anymore. You... I need you Phoebe."_ Helga said. She was falling apart and it felt like the world was out to get her. Helga sobbed in her hand. This pain was worse then the pain of dying.

" _A-And Ph... Phoebe you're saying Arnold needs me...b-but what if he doesn't love me! Best friends are supposed to stay be each other's side for stuff like that. What about that whole **'Sisters before Mister.'** crap, chicks always talk about!" _Helga said sobbing a little harder

Phoebe gently took Helga's hands away from her face, then pulled her into a warm embrace. **"Why are you doubting the love he has for you, and the love for him?"** Phoebe asked sternly.

Helga was shocked to say the least. _"Why would you say he loves me?"_ Helga asked truly confused. Phoebe smiled brightly. **"Because I know he does."**

Helga couldn't believe what she was hearing, this couldn't be true. Her life didn't allow her to have happiness. " _But how can you be s-_ " Helga was cut off by another person approaching from the black and blue abyss that surrounded them.

Both Phoebe and Helga gasped at thef person they saw before them. Phoebe allowed a tear to slide down her cheek as she smiled.

 **"Hello Gerald..."**

* * *

 **Arnold's POV**

The Police were there in ten minutes just like they said. The checked Helga head to toe for more bruises. And they found more, more bruises, more cuts, and more deeper and older scars. Arnold was kinda glad that Helga was unconscious, who knows what she would do if she was up. It the Officers a nother ten minutes to take pictures and get their evidence.

Then just like they said, Bob amd Miriam Pataki walked into the hospital. Miriam looked like she's been crying, while Bob's face showed no emotions at all. One of the Police Officers walked up to Bob with a scowl. He was about the same height and body size as Bob, if not bigger. "Is your name Robert Bob Pataki?" The Officer asked in a growl.

Bob looked at him up and down before nodding. _He always did look like an idiot to me..._ Arnold thought to himself. In one swift fluid motion, the cop had Bob's arms behind his back. "Robert Bob Pataki you are under arrest for abuse and neglect against your youngest daughter, Helga Geraldine Pataki." There was a gasp beside the cop. Everyone turned to see Miriam, with tears in her eyes, and her hands covering her mouth.

She swiftly walked up to Bob and slapped him. "How could you?! You monster, hurting my poor baby." Miriam said tears, and hate in her eyes. Bob looked at her shocked, then angry. "Me I wasn't the only one hurting the girl!" He yelled. Miriam slapped him again. "Don't you dare try to pull me into this you horrible monster!" Miriam yelled Doctors pulled her back and nurses tried to comfort her s the Police officers dragged Bob away.

Arnold slowly made his way to Miriam. "Mrs. Pataki... are you going to be okay?" Arnold asked kindly. Miriam looked at him, after talking to a Doctor. "Yes... The Doctor said he would take me to see Helga." She said as they made their way to an elevator. Arnold nodded. "I hope you'll be okay, Mrs. Pataki." Arnold said with a smile.

Miriam looked at him, then shesmiled as well. "We'll be fine, Arnold." She said as the door closed. He stood there shocked. _She said m-my name, but... but she never says my name right._ Even if something serious was happening she never said his name right! Even when Helga had amnesia, she called him Alfred.

Arnold felt another chill run dwn his spin. He had to get to Helga's room.

 _Something is not right I can feel it._

* * *

 **Miriam's POV**

 _ **This is all HER fault... She had to be born... if only I had gotten rid of her before this... Everything would be simple... now she scscrewed up my life even more!**_..Miriam thought to herself as the Doctor took her to Helga's room. Miriam has been thinking about it for some time now, and this is the perfect time.

 _ **She got rid of Bob... all I have to do is kill her then make it look natural. Then it just me and Olga.** _ She thought with a sick smile.

 _ **Just kill her and everthing will be okay...**_

* * *

 **A/N: I hope you like the chapter! Sorry for not updating faster... I honestly have no excuse. 8(**

 _ **RR &F **ddo iit X3 _


	11. Chapter 11: To Love, To Protect 2

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: This will be one of my shortest chapters... and I only made two of them. This will mostly just for information on how, and what's up with Gerald, the next chapter is gonna come a little later. That's it... I think. I have noticed that I am making them cuss a LOT. *shrug* _ENJOY!_**

 _ **Disclaimer: ... I-I-I O-O-OWN NO-NO-NO TH-TH-THING... AHHHHH! OwO**_

* * *

 **Chapter 11: To Love, To Protect, To Let Go P2**

 ** _The man snaked right arm around Gerald's torsos, and used his left hand to cover Gerald's mouth. So only Gerald's muffled cries for help could be heard, as he and the figure disappeared into the shadows of the night._**

 ** _~*§*~_**

 _He kicked and screamed but it was useless, Gerald didn't want to die! Not yet! He still had so much he wanted to do!_

 _Gerald used his rush of adrenalin to kick the guy holding him in his leg, **hard**! The man that __captured him_ _yelp in pain, and dropped Gerald carelessly on the ground. "Help!" Gerald yelled as he ran. "Help me!" He did get very far before he was caught again. Gerald kicked and screamed, yet once again, him cries went unheard. Gerald was thrown to the ground hard enough to hit his head._

 _Gerald_ _didn't have enough time to think about what was going on, before he_ _felt the man who captured him use both of his knees to hold down. Fear clutched Gerald's heart nicely as he felt something other then a hand cover his mouth. It was some rag that was soaked with rum. Gerald would have gagged if he could._

 _He looked at the guy over him, he was wearing a long sleeve jacket, dark blue jeans, and black boots. Gerald couldn't see his face, and what scared him most was that. This man felt like he was empty, like he lost everything. "I'm sorry." He said, to Gerald's confusion. Then Gerald felt something wet hit his cheeks. Gerald was crying, yes. But his tears were flowing into his ears. No... this guy was crying, too._

 _"I'm so sorry... I-I just don't want to die alone." He said softly. Gerald grew more scared and tried to struggle again. My guy holding him saw this and gave a sad smile (even if Gerald couldn't see it) and sighed. "Hey, I know your scared, and just because you a kid." He said then pulled out a knife. "I kill you with this. That way, if someone comes along and see you, you might get saved." He then pulled out a gun, and Gerald's heart stopped._

 _"Then I'll shoot myself with this, see it's a win, win thing. You get to possibly live, and I get to think someone died with me." He said with a smile. Gerald gave him a look that said. **' Are you serious!'** Gerald shook his frantically._ **This is not a win-win situation! You... You FUCKING SYCOPHANTIC NUT JOB!** _Gerald yelled in his head. The man holding him said sorry one last time, before he stabbed Gerald with the knife. Gerald yelled one last muffled cry before his eyelids became heavy and he was over came with a feeling of pure bliss._

 _Gerald closed his eyes, but not before hearing a gun shot._ **basterd...** _Gerald thought to himself, he then closed his eyes gently._

* * *

 _Gerald_ ...

 _Ger-ALD..._

 _GERALD!_

 _Gerald'sGerald's eyes fluttered open, yet they were welcomed by the site of black and blue darkness. **"Wha... Oh yeah... I'm dead."** Gerald said with a sigh. He wobbled to stand to his feet, then looked around. **"Where am I?"** He asked as if someone would give him an answer. **"Hello!"** He yelled. Silence followed soon after. Gerald started walking around aimlessly. **"Is this really the after life?"** He stated taking a look around. " **Kinda anticlimactic."** Gerald said with a sigh._

 ** _"I may as well take a look around and see what I find."_** _Gerald said as he started to take shaky steps, still trying to wake up fully. **"Hello? Is anyone here?!"** Gerald yelled **.**_ If I am dead... does this mean I can see Phoebe..? _Gerald thought smiling softly. Gerald keep walking looking around for any sign of the one he loves._

 _ **"She has to be here somewhere."** Gerald insisted. The eerie darkness was starting to get to him. This place gave him the chills, and he felt lost... well he was lost. **"Now that I think about it what am I supposed to do now?"** Gerald asked no one **.** Gerald sighed and keep walking. After what felt like an hour, Gerald saw three spots in the distance. One was pink, one blue, and the last one white. It looked like they were talking._

 _Gerald slowed down some just trying to hear them._

 _"Phoebe I need you... your my best friend. If I had to go do some crazy 'my love for Arnold is a secret' mission. You would always be there for me. When I felt sad, and lashed out... y-you would take it... all for me. Phoebe I-I can't be there alone anymore. You... I need you Phoebe." The pink spot said. She then fell to the ground sobbing in her hand._

 _Gerald felt his heart clinch at the sound of that girl crying, then it hit him._

 ** _"Phoebe?"_** _Gerald whispered._

 _"A-And Ph... Phoebe you're saying Arnold needs me...b-but what if he doesn't love me! Best friends are supposed to stay be each other's side for stuff like that. What about that whole 'Sisters before Mister.' crap, chicks always talk about!" She continued, while sobbing a little harder._

 _As Gerald came closer he started to see them clearly. It was Phoebe! Next to her, Gerald wasn't really sure who that woman was, but he really didn't care once he saw who the last person there._

 ** _"Helga?!"_** _Gerald asked clearly astonished. He had no idea Phoebe's death effected her so much. But know that he tought about it... he could see Brainy was right. Helga really did care about Phoebe. Knowing this Gerald felt like he was hit by a ton of bricks. He felt like a huge jerk. Then he blinked._

Does this mean Helga loves Arnold... why would she hid that? _He questioned. Gerald keep watching a little longer, unaware of the fact that he was still walking._

 _Phoebe gently took Helga's hands away from her face, then pulled her into a warm embrace._ **"Why are you doubting the love he has for you, and the love you have for him?"** _Phoebe asked sternly._

 _Helga was shocked to say the least. "Why would you say he loves me?" Helga asked truly confused. Phoebe smiled brightly. "_ **Because I know he does.".** _Helga started shaking her head, her eyes looked, angry, sad, and confused._

" _But how can you be s-_ " _Helga looked up and her eyes meet Gerald's. He now saw fear flash in her sapphire_ _blue eues. Phoebe looked at her best friend, then she turned around, and her honey brown eyes, meet gis dark brown ones. Phoebe gave Gerald a warm smile still holding her best friend._

 **"Hi, Gerald."** _She said softly, Gerald's heart skipped a beat. Then he gave ger a warm smile of his own._

 ** _"Hello, Phoebe."_**

* * *

 **A/N: Okay I finished this! Yahooo! I have to say I have some stuff going on so I will not be able to update for a while. :(**

 **But I will get some stuff out of the way! Next chapter is back at the Hospital! Thanks for staying by my side with my stories! :)**

 **RR XD**


	12. Chapter 12: Opened Doors

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N:... lol I want to apologize! This is an intense story. Heehee. I guess that's because it's reaching it's climax *shrug*. Oh and this might be short... don't know yet... _ENJOY!_**

 **DISCLAIMER: ... I am to sleepy to make a silly one.. so I just don't own Hey Arnold *shrug*.**

* * *

 **Chapter 12: Opened Doors And Secrets Revealed**

 **Miriam's POV**

Miriam was trying her hardest not to bounce with each step she took. She was just so excited! True many people would call her sick, for being happy about killing a kid they brought into the world. However think about it this way! Helga was a useless girl, she wasn't supposed to be alive in the first place! Miriam wanted a boy! Bob wanted a boy! So it's only Helga's fault this happened to her.

As they made their way towards Helga's door, the doctor turned towards Miriam with a sympathetic smile. Miriam mentally rolled her eyes. _These people are idiots..._ She thought to herself. Yet she gave him a teary eyed half smile. Miriam had been crying, but they were tears of joy. "Thank you." She said sincerely.

She was thankful, he showed her to the child's room, now she just had to take care of her and everything would be fine. Miriam nearly fainted with joy, once she opened the door. She took a look around, Helga's room was small, so that meant no roommates. "Good." Miriam said under her breath. "What did you say Mrs. Pataki?" The doctor next to her asked.

Miriam allowed more fake tears to fall from her eyes, as she forced a look of concern. "Helga is a good girl, and didn't deserve this." Miriam said with tears, trying not to chock or gag on her words. She then she frowned. "And please, don't call me that. I want nothing to do with that awful man." She said with a growl.

The doctor nodded in understanding. "As you wish. What should I call you Ma'am..?" Miriam faked a shaky smile. "Just call me, Miriam." She said softly. The doctor gave her a smile. "Of course, Miriam." The doctor said nicely. Miriam smiled. The doctor face turned down cased as he looked at Helga, who was laying there, unmoving. Dead to the world... but not dead like Miriam wanted. The doctor sighed.

"Would you like me to leave you..." Miriam nodded witha sad smile. "I would really like that, thank you." She said. The doctor nodded and left. Miriam waited till she could no longer hear his footsteps to talk. The laughed a low butter laugh.

"Wow... He was such an idiot. Almost like the rest of them." She laughed again. Then she turned towards Helga with a wickied smile.

"Now... on to you."

* * *

 **Arnold's POV**

Arnold ran as fas as he could. He was stopped many times by people in the hospital saying he shouldn't run, but he had to. Helga was in danger and he had to stop Miriam. The little hero rushed around the corner, and was welcomed by the site of the doctor that was with her. Arnold ran up to him quickly.

"Excuse me, Mister! Did you take Miriam Pataki, to Helga's room?" Arnold asked. The doctor gave Arnold a sad smile. "Yes I did, Miriam looked sad. Like she couldn't get her thoughts together. I don't blame the poor woman, after what her husband did. That is just unforgivable. "The man said with a shake of his head.

Arnold still couldn't stop his feeling of worry. Something didn't seem right, he just knew it. Arnold gave the doctor a nod before he smiled. "I'll go in there with her. I don't think she should be alone." Arnold said kindly. The doctor gave him a warm smile. "That's very nice of you. "He said before walking off.

Arnold stood there for a second before he ran off. In his heart he knew something wasn't right, and he would stop whatever is wrong from happening.

 _Just wait, Helga!_

But before he could run off he saw someone being brought in on a stretcher.

* * *

 **Miriam's POV**

Miriam giggled from the rush she felt. She was about to take someone's life, but not just anyone's. Her own daughter, it was such a high for her. Miriam looked at the child she never wanted in the world. She had to admit, she did feel sorry for the kid.

"Maybe if you get a next at life..." Miriam stopped to giggle once again. "Maybe, next time God won't make you so useless! "She exclaimed before laughing. Miriam sat in the chair across from Helga's motionless body. She placed her purse in her lap, then began to go through it. All with a very pleased smile on her face.

"You know, Helga. I think I could tolerate you more if you stayed like this." Miriam said but then sighed. "Yet we all know every good thing must come to an end, at one point in time." She said. "How could you be such a disappointment?" Miriam asked as she stood by Helga's bed side. "It's sad really, I just wanted a boy. Was that so much to ask?" She said looking at her.

"If you were a boy then maybe we could have given you a chance." She said then shook her head. "You made it worse by being so useless. All you did was scowl and shake you fist. You are so ungrateful, and I hope you can hear me."She said. "You should be happy, Helga. You weren't loved, and you would never be loved. So you should think of this as a mercury killing." She said as she pulled a needle from her bag.

Miriam smiled brightly, as if she was held the cure to ever disease known to man kind. "Would you like to know what this is?" She asked as if Helga could reply.

Miriam smiled as she made her way over towards Helga's IV drip. "This is an untraceable poison. As soon as it's in your blood stream it will numb all your muscles, your heart included." Miriam said with a soft smile. "Then I could finally be done with you." She said happily. Yet before she could carry out her dark act.

The door opened.

* * *

 **Helga's POV**

Her heart stopped... well she didn't have a heart, but if she did, it would have stopped. Gerald stood there staring at her intensely. He heard her, that was clear. He heard the very secret, she tried to hide from the world. That she gave up so much to keep protected, what would he do to her. Helga hated this, she was becoming so weak... and she hated it.

Tears slide down her cheeks, and she heard Gerald let in a sharp in take of air. She was Helga G Pataki for CRIMINY'S sake! She wasn't supposed to be so weak!

Yet she just killed herself, and she's cried more tears in one month, then she has in years! Helga felt her throat begain to burn. Helga fell to her knees.

 _"How much did you hear?"_ Helga asked not looking up once.

 _ **"Enough, I guess. "**_ Gerald said with a shrug.

 _"Did you hear what I said about me lov-"_ Gerald cut her words off.

 _ **"Yes.."**_

Helga stood there in shock, was he gonna laugh at her? Was he gonna say something mean..? what was he planning?

Gerald scratch the back of his head. _**"I gotta say, I am surprised. To think after all those years of you picking on my best friend. I'm shocked to hear you did all that out of love.**_ " He said. Helga looked up, her teary blue eyes meet his livid brown ones. _Is he angry..? I could understand if he was._ Helga thought looking down in shame.

As if reading her mind, Gerald sighed. _**"Yes... I am mad."**_ Helga flinched slightly. Gerald keep going. _ **"All these year of pranks, spit balls, mean notes, dumping food on him, spraying him at the water fountain, and so on! And you say you did this out if love?!"**_ Helga just sat there letting ever word hit her, and they did it hard.

Gerald sighed again trying to calm down. _ **"I just don't get it... how could you hurt someone you love."**_ Gerald said. Helga did the unexpected... she laughed. Her laughed echoed in the dark void. Maybe even God heard her? She laughed, and that made Gerald mad, and Phoebe scared. Gerald matched over to her and grabbed her by her shoulders. _ **"What's so funny?"**_ He asked darkly.

But Helga only laughed more.

Gerald growled, then he started shacking her. _**"Why the hell are you laughing!"**_ He yelled. _**"Tell me! Because I want to laugh too! What the hell do you think is so fucking funny!"**_ He screamed at her.

 **"Gerald STOP!"**

Gerald turned around. Phoebe looked at him with tears in her eyes, and shacking with rage. **"Gerald. Helga has been through more then any kid at P.S 118 has ever been through! So stop yelling at her like you know her pain!"** Phoebe yelled at him. Gerald was taken aback, then he looked at Helga, who hung her head to the side. Tears still ran down her cheeks, Gerald growled then let her slip out of his fingers.

Helga fell back to her knees, her eyes looked dead once again. _**"What is ther reason for hurting my friend?! I think I deserve to know?!"**_ He yelled angrily. Phoebe looked away, it wasn't her place to tell him. Gerald looked at her amazed, then he laughed. _**"So I don't even get a reason! I'm supposed to believe you, and you don't even give me a reason too!?"** _ He yelled growing hurries. Then he heard her in a soft weak voice.

 _"You're right..."_ Helga said.

Gerald looked at her, then he crossed his arms. **_"Then tell me... why? Why all the secrets, and doing way to much?"_** Helga looked at him, trying to keep his gaze, but then looked back down.

Helga didn't think she would ever have to explain herself, and to Gerald of all people. She wanted to laugh, but her tears stopped her. Helga closed her eyes, she didn't want to look at them. Gerald thought she had changed her mind and was about to say something. But Phoebe held up her hand to stop him.

When she did Helga finally spoke.

 _"It was because I'm weak..."_

* * *

 **A/N: Hey! I know people were surprised that Gerald didn't flip out. And really he didn't do it now, he was just mad. Everyone gets mad when they don't get the answer they want. And as for Miriam... simply pot she is just crazy!**

 **Till bext we meet!**

 **R &R**


	13. Chapter 13: Explain

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Ollo my lovelies! I am trying to do way to much at once! This will most likely be a short chapter. I'm gonna start with Helga, then Arnold, and end with Miriam. Or a flashback which ever way I see fit. ENJOY! X3**

 **DISCLAIMER: NOOOOO I CAN'T OWN HEY ARNOLD! AHHHHHHH DX**

* * *

 **Chapter 13: Explain**

 **Helga's POV (Third Person)**

Gerald looked at Helga, his face going from blank, to thoughtful, to confused. What did she mean. To him, this just didn't make any since. _**"What the hell do you mean, 'It was because I'm weak'? That makes no since."**_ Gerald said in a annoyed voice. Helga was getting on his nerves with her mind games. Helga sighed, her tears having dried already, spoke very softly to Gerald.

 _"Gerald... have you ever even wondered **why,** I pick on people?"_ Helga asked in a soft voice. Gerald didn't get what that had to do with anything, but he decided to humor her this once.

Gerald crossed his arms over his chest. _**"No. I just thought you were a heartless person."** _ Gerald said flatly. Helga nodded. " _Yes, everyone does, and that's what I wanted you to think."_ Helga asked in a airy voice. Gerald raised an eyebrow, his arms still crossed. **_"Again that doesn't make since."_** He said flatly again.

Helga sighed. And Gerald took that as a 'just sit down' kind of sigh. _"Gerald... I don't **like** hurting people..." _Gerald rolled his eyes ** _."Wow. The way you act it's so hard to tell."_** He said sarcastically. Helga gave a slow sigh. _"I know that, and again that's what I wanted... I wanted to push people away so they couldn't hurt me."_ Gerald looked at her indeffrently.

 _ **"So you hurt people, so they wouldn't hurt you?"**_ He asked flatly.

Helga nodded. She was close to tears thinking about it. All the heartache she pushed through, all the sadness she chocked down. How she _had_ to hurt people just to survive. Helga didn't... no.. **_couldn't BREATH..._** without her throat burning with unshed tears. The hate she had to sleep around as she laid her head down at night. Her mother's words. Her father's hands. And the fact that she lived in her sister's shadow.

 _ **"THAT'S BULLSHIT!"**_ Gerald yelled out raged.

Helga looked at him with wide eyes, and shocked. She flew to her feet, Gerald, and Phoebe were right behind her. Helga had death in her cold blue eyes, Gerald had anger in his chocolate brown ones, and Phoebe had concern written in her own. Helga broke the silence with a growl.

" _What?!"_ She cried angrily _._

Gerald glared at her, then spoke slowly as if talking to a small child.

 **"That's BULLSHIT!"**

* * *

 **Arnold's POV**

Arnold's breath hitched at the sight before him... his best friend, Gerald...He was here with seven Doctors around him. And all of them covered in blood... _**his blood.**_ Arnold grew pale, his blood ran cooled. And it was almost like the air was forced out of his chest. To his horror he could hear the Doctors yell around him, and how could he not the _were_ **yelling.**

 **"How big, and where is the wound?!" The head Doctor asked.**

 _" Seven centimeters, and in the left ventricle, Sir!" A female voice said._

 ** _"Sir, there is a decrease in blood pressure and a increase in his tachycardia!" Came a males voice._** (A/N: Tachycardia is an abnormally rapid heart rate.)

The doctor cursed under his breath in a growl.

 **"We have to get him to the emergency room before we lose him!"**

With that they rushed behind double doors, and it wasyhen that Arnold felt himself let out a breath he unknowingly held. Arnold rushed over the the front desk hoping to get answers. "Excuse me, Miss!" Arnold asked the old woman sitting there. "Yes baby what can I do for you?" She asked in a soft tone. Arnold nodded. "do you know what happened to the Boy that just came through here?" He asked a bit franic.

 **"I know what happened to him."**

Arnold turned arounded to see a woman around middle age, but what got to Arnold... was that her hand were covered in blood.

 _ **his blood.**_

"You know what happened to my best friend?" Arnold asked in a shaky voice. The young woman face flashed in horror. "H-he's your best friend?" She asked fearfully. Arnold nodded confused and worried. The woman looked at Arnold in horror slowly, she brought her blood coverd hands towards her face. She forgot that they had an inoccent kid's blood on them.

"I-I'm so sorry!" she said as she fell to her knees. Arnold looked at her shocked. HE rushed over towrds the woman on the ground, and placed his hands on her shoulder. "Please tell me what happened!" Arnold cried, tears pricking his eyes. The woman with looked up at him, softly she whisperd.

 _"I was there and I didn't save him."_

* * *

 **Miriam's POV (Third Person)**

Miriam stood still as tthe door opened, reveling the doctor that worked on Helga. Miriam quickly hind the needle back in her purse. The doctor (Mr. Broner*A/N: yes it is random a name*) gave Miriam a sceptical look. She wasn't supposed to be here!

 _ ***Small flash back***_

 _Dr. Broner just hung up the phone, after calling the little Miss Pataki's mother. The man sighed to himself, he hoped that the presents would get here soon. He could only barely imagine how they must feel. Broner himself had two kids, a daughter and a son, he would be devastated if they were here like this. When Boner turned around he watched as the little football headed kid ran towards him._

 _"Did you just call the Patakis?!" He asked in a rushed voice. The Doctor turned around fully, and smiling kindly at the young child. "Yes I did, they said they would be here in thirty minutes." He said ignorant to the danger around him._

 _Broner watched as the kid's whole body went pale, then fear and worry graced his features . He grew confused at the little boys reaction. "Is something wrong kid?" He asked. Then the kid with the football head, face went blank. Yet slowly he began to frown._

 _In a flash, the nine year old pushed the Doctor forceful against his desk, and spoke in a low voice. " **How the HELL did you not see the palm prints on her?"** The kid asked in a dangerously chilled voice, and his body was seething with pure rage. That only confused Broner more , he was afraid of __this ten year old, who happens to only reach his pocket! "W-what palm prints?!" He asked in a shaky voice._

 _His confusion seem to have only angered the boy further. The once calm and sad young man slammed the Doctor against his desk, causing the Broner to gasp. "The ones that cover her face and neck." He said through his teeth. Broner was shaking to the core, he never knew someone could be so scary... he never knew a kid could be **THIS** scary. And he was even more horrified, to think about what he, himself had just done. He was a_ **Fat** **her** _ **for God's sake!** The small child pushed the Doctor down and rushed to the phone._

 _"Hello police... I have reason to fear for my friends life. She's in the hospital right now, and she has bruises, and palm prints on her. I think she's being abused at home." He said calmly, even though he knew this was serious. His palms where sweaty with fear, and worry. Broner looked over at the kid who was doing what he neglected to do._

 _He then looked down ashamed._

* * *

 _Broner was at the desk closed to Miss Pataki's room when he heard yelling. **That must be the parents getting taken away.** He thought to himself with a deep sigh **. How could I have missed those marks**. He thought as he looked over in horror, sadness, and rage directed at himself. When he thought about how the young girl look he grew furious at himself. Broner sighed once again trying to calm himself._

 _"Well I can't think about that now. I have to do my job **right** and try to make that an atonement." He said as he slid back on his lab coat. Yes he did make a mistake, and that's why he needsto work harder for this little girl. He had to make things right._

 _"I just hope it's enough to make up for my mistake..." He whispered._

 ** _*End flashback*_**

As Broner stood before Miriam, he felt slightly uneasy. _Is she supposed to be here?_ He questioned. Miriam had different thought in mind. _He's kinda cute._ She thought without a drop of shame. "Hello ma'am... and you are..?" He asked kindly, even if he was still suspicious of the woman before him. Miriam smiled and held out her hand, the one not in her purse. "My name is Miriam... Helga's mother." She said. Miriam truly hated saying such things.

 _Look at the bright side... once she gone. I'll never have to say those words again._ Miriam thought with a giggle. Bronner raised his eyebrow at the sound, but still nodded. "Yes, Miriam... of course." He said, then he looked at the small child on the bex next to her. "I truly am sorry, Mrs. Pataki." Broner said sadly. Miriam looked at him curiously. "Why's that?" She asked. Bronner walked towards Helga's bed side just beside the blonde mother.

"No mother should have to see their daughter like this." He said softly. Miriam shook her head with a sigh. "The girl brought this upon herself. I know she knows better, I mean really! If she's going to drown she could at least do it right." She said. However, after she ran that line over again in her head... she regretted them. The doctor next to her scowled.

"Mrs. Pataki-" Miriam growled at him, she whipped her head around accidentally dropping the needle in her hand on the ground. "I am not a **_FUCKING_** Pataki! Stop calling me that!" The doctor was taken by the out busrt. "I apologize Mrs... Miria-" The Doctor stopped when notice the needle on the floor. "What is this..?" He asked. Miriam followed his eyes, and stiffened. _"Shit."_

Broner slowly bent down and picked the needle off the ground. After further inspection of said needle. He knew exactly what was in it. "This is... Ma'am... w-why do you have this." Broner asked. As he held up the needle. Miriam looked down at the Doctor, and grew pale. Only one thought ran through her.

 _Fuck..._

* * *

 **A/N: I am sorry. My world has been spinning, and now it feels like I'm waiting for the crash. I'm going to try and get all my stories on a schedule! Please be patient! X3**

 **RRF**


	14. Chapter 14: Time to come clean P1

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Hi missed me? Well way back! Thank you for hopefully waiting for me! My mind is still fighting with me, soooo this is done in a haze. I hope this will suffice. ~ ω ~ Also depending on how long this chapter is it will most likely be on its own.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING NOW LETS GET THIS PARTY STARTED! WOOO!**

* * *

 **Chapter 14: Time to come clean. (Part 1.)**

 **ARNOLD'S POV (THIRD** _PERSON)_

Arnold couldn't believe his ears. "W-what." He asked the women how fell to her knees before him sobbing. It was as if dark Arnold was having a field day, he grabbed the sobbing woman's shirt, like he did the doctor. Yes he knew somewhere deep in his mind that this was a woman... a grown woman, however he couldn't stop himself. Arnold felt as if he had to be like this... If only to fight off the pessimistic voice in the back of his head with what little straight he had.

Arnold too wanted to fall to his knees and cry. Everyone important to him were leaving him, but he had to fight. He knew that if he stayed strong he would be fine... that everything would turn out okay. Arnold to a deep breath, then he looked the still sobbing woman in the eye. "Please tell me what happened." He said as calmly as he could.

The middle aged woman looked down in shame. The least she could do was tell this boy the ugly truth. "O-okay..." Sh sniffled out.

* * *

 _ **FLASHBACK!**_

 _It was 5:35 by the time Maria finally left the cafe. She just had a bad break up, and wanted nothing more then to drown her sorrow in rum, and bad movies. As she round the corner, she noticed a young African American boy walking down the street. Gazing off else where as if he was thinking about someone he loved. Maria looked at the boy with envy._

 _He didn't have to feel love's bitter bite at such a young age. Plus even if he **did** have a break up... it would have only been a mear chrush. Not real love, the kind she had felt towards the man who had just broken her heart. Yes. Maria looked at his warm glazed over eyes with a deep hate. Yet her eyes widen once she saw him being snached into an alleyway._

 _"H-Hey!" She yelled. She than ran towards the alley. She watched horrified, as the same kid ran out said alley, only to be pulled back in. "Hey! Stop!" She called again. When Maria made it to the entrance of the alley, she was about to jump when she heard a male voice loud and clear._

 **"...Kill you with this..."**

 _For a moment time stood still, Maria's breath hitched._

 ** _Did she really hear that?_**

 **"... might get saved."** _What the hell was going on?!_ **"Then I'll shot myself with this! See it's a win, win thing! You get to probably live, and I get to think some one died with me."**

 _Maria was stunned. Someone was going to kill that kid! Maria turned around ready to stop him... when she stop herself. A picture of that boy's warm, smiling, and happy face flashed in her mind. The face... that showed bliss t_ _hat could only be found in another. Unknow to Maria, a tear ran down her cheek, as she stood there wide eyed._

 ** _I could stop him..._** _She thought to herself._

 _But then a sick voice from the back of her mind spoke._

 _Or you could let them see how you feel. Let the people who love him, know that there is such a thing called **heartache...**_

 _Maria began to fight with herself between the voice of reason, and the voice of spit. But everything fell silent, as the sound of a muffled cry completely derailed Maria's train of thought, she gasped. Without hesitating this time she jumped out. She should have **l** **eft.**.. she should have been **sooner**. Either way... she was to late. "... no." She said softly. She must have still been loud enough for the man before her to turn around. He pulled the hood of his grey jacket from of his head._

 _Maria had to take a step back. His face... it scared her. He had shaggy brown hair that looked unkept. He looked fairly handsome, but when he looked at her. His eyes... they where a dull lifeless grey. They sent shivers all over her body. What he did next was the most unexpected... He..._

 _He **smiled.**_

 ** _BANG!_**

 _Time speed up again. Maria stood there shocked, she felt numb, what was going on. She trembled, overwhelmed by what just happened. Maria dared to look down, she felt sick, she wanted to scream. Half of his face was missing, blood ran down his neck, she could see... what could never be unseen. (A/N: Damn... maybe this should be rated M.)_

 _Maria placed a shaky hand on her mouth. Then with another brave act on her part, glanced over to the innocent young boy. He didn't look as... messy as the man. It then hit her._

 **"... might get saved."**

 _Maria ran over to the fallen child, and pulled out her phone. As Maria talked to the woman on the phone, her mind was running with **'what if'** questions._

 ** _What if she had left?_**

 ** _What if she had jumped out?_**

 ** _._**

 ** _._**

 ** _._**

 ** _... what if this kid dies?_**

 _Once Maria was finally done she dropped her phone and hunched forward. Allowing her hands to touch the ground, trying to feel something tangible. Telling herself this was real... but was that a good thing? The ground felt sticky, and it was because of that discomfort that caused Maria to open her eyes. She stumbled backwards, then looked at the child before her. He didn't look hurt, in a funny way, he was sleeping with a knife in his chest._

 _Yet when Maria brought her blood covered hands in her line of sight... she couldn't allow herself to be so ignorant._

 ** _Please God... let them not be to late._** _She thought to herself, for who... she didn't know anymore._

* * *

 ** _END FLASHBACK_**

By now Maria was just looking down in shame. If she had stopped that man this would have never happened, that boy wouldn't be near death. The football headed kid wouldn't be losing his best friend. Maria felt sick for even thinking about wanting this! She felt like a horrible person! **LIKE A FUCKING MONSTER!**

Arnold didn't see it like that. He was thankful that Maria stayed to help Gerald in the first place. He placed his small hand on the crown of Maria's head. Maria flinched and looked up at the small football headed boy. Arnold smiled down at her with warm kind eyes.

"Thank you." He said softly.

Maria was confused, why was he thanking her? She hesitated to help his friend!... she was responsible for this! She was a monster! She didn't deserve his thanks! She was about to say so... when Arnold hugged her. As if he read her mind he responded. "Thank you, because even though you did hesitate at first. You didn't hesitate to call for help the second time, so thank you... you're a good person." He said with the same soft voice.

Maria started crying again, and Arnold could feel it, before she could pull Arnold into a hug. He pulled away, and gave her a sad smile. "I'm sorry but I have to go help my other friend." He said before running off. Maria was so wrapped up, that she didn't stop to ask **why** was Arnold her in the first place. "GOD BLESS YOU!" She screamed after him.

* * *

Arnold looked down, then back up more determined then before.

He didn't need god to bless him... but he did need her to give him straight to keep going.

"Just a little more." He said trying to keep himself together.

 _just a little more..._

* * *

 **A/N: I AM DONE!... FINALLY! Sorry I know I said I was going to update the day before yesterday, but I got stuck on some lines... sorry. ANYHOW! I hope like the chapter. Fun fact I got the name for Maria from Sonic. I've been having a weird Sonic craving lately. XD**

 _ **R &R**_


	15. Chapter 15: Can't remember the name

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: ...I decided how to end this... well not completely, I have two ideas. But I can only think of if at the last minute. Right now we find ourselves with Helga, Phoebe, and Gerald. Please keep in mind that the after life is well... _enjoy!_ (='ω'=)**

 **P.S this chapter will explain why the Jungle Movie (In this story) didn't happen.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I don't own Hey Arnold**

* * *

 **Chapter 15: Time to come clean. (Part 2)**

 **IN PURGATORY(?)**

He was shacking, all of... _this_ it just did not make any sense! **_"What you did is unforgivable! You can't make an excuse for that! You made my friends life a nightmare! All because you say you 'LOVE' him!"_** Gerald glared at Helga, on her part. Helga looked shocked, she closed her eyes. Her hands shaking at her side. Helga dropped her head, turning it to the side. Somewhere in her, she knew that what Gerald was saying was true. She was an awful person, but he didn't know the whole story. Helga opened her mouth ready to speck...

 ** _"...You don't deserve his love."_**

Helga looked at Gerald speechles, he looked so serious too. Gerald looked Helga calmly in the eyes, and spoke in an even voice. **_"You. will. NEVER. deserve his love."_** He said simply. Helga's eyes began to water.

Did he really just say that? Helga took a step back, trying to escape Gerald's devastating words, but ended up tripping over nothingness. Helga looked at the dark skinned boy, petrified. Helga closed her eyes, and covered her ears with her hands trying to find away to block Gerald's words. She knew what she did was unforgivable, she always knew that! B-but she wasn't... she could not... what _was_ she doing. **How could she do this?!**

All at once the darkness that surrounded the group of four felt heavier to the young girl. Words and voices swirled around her, overwhelming her with the hatred, and venom dripping from their every being... they where the words that broke her down piece by piece.

 **"I OWN YOU!"**

 _"...no."_ She said softly. those were all lies...

 ** _"Why couldn't Helga be a good girl like me?"_**

 _"...no."_ They were just lies... right?

 **"We just wanted to show the works how ugly you are!"**

"...no.!" **Someone please tell her these were just lies**

 _"Who would fall for someone as ugly as you?"_

"NO" **SOMEONE! ANYONE! PLEASE!**

 _ **"That boy will never love such an ugly bitch like you."**_

 _"_ **NO**!" ** _THESE ARE LIES ALL JUST LIES! THEY HAD TO BE! LIES! LIES! LIES_**

 ** _THEY WERE LIES!_**

 ** _LIES!_**

 ** _...only lies!_**

 _...You don't deserve his love._

 _" **AAHHHHHHHHHHH!"**_ Helga yelled throwing her head back in pure excruciating agony. She couldn't take it, her mind was swimming threw ragging seas of hurt, and sorrow. Helga fell to the ground defeated, broken, and just done. She sobbed, and sobbed, and sobbed. Gerald stood over her and shooked his head, a scowl on his face.

 **"...Gerald."** A soft voice called behind him. Gerald sighed, he completly forget about Phoebe (ironic, huh?). Gerald slowly turned around. _**"Look, Phoebe. I'm sor-"**_

 _ **SLAP!**_

All of the after life fell silent, only the sounds of Helga sobbing could be heard threw the dark abyss. Gerald face was still turned, he slowly reached for his aching cheek. Finally it had dawned on him what had happen. Gerald gave Phoebe a sceptical look, but he soon gasped. Phoebe scowled at Gerald, tears streaming down her cheeks.

 ** _"HOW DARE YOU!"_** She yelled visible shacking with rage. Gerald stood there shocked, then he scowled. **"How dare I what? Tell Helga the truth?!"** He asked/ yelled **.** Phoebe glared at him. **"How dare you speak about Helga like that?!"** She asked yelling at him as well.

she looked into his eyes, crying. **"I'm not saying what she did was okay, but you don't know the pain she's been though! You never felt what she had to feel. You were not beat just because you were born. You never really had to face the world mostly alone! But she has! Through out everything! This was Helga's way of saying I'll keep fighting! I won't let you hurt me!"** Phoebe said proudly with tears in her eyes. She knew now how much her dear friend. Heck! Her dear _**sister**_ had to go through.

She looked at Gerald with a sigh. **"But Helga sadly was still mostly alone... how many people do you think really care about Helga, Gerald?"** She asked him softly. Gerald thought about it, he thought about everything that has happened, and how everything thought Helga had been the reason Phoebe died. He looked at the broken, sobbing, mess, that was Helga. G. Pataki. Phoebe nodded.

 **"It's only me and Arnold. But Helga... Helga's still has fear in her heart. And that fear is Arnold... LOVING Arnold."** She said softly. **"To Helga, Arnold is something of a saving grace. He's the reason why she keeps going each day... but how can you keep going without help? How can you keep fighting when you were already beaten down so much."** She asked hI'm with a blank look in her eyes.

Gerald didn't know how to answer her. **_how can you?_** He mentally asked himself. Phoebe answered for him. **"You can't, not alone. That's why she had me."** Phoebe said with a sad smile.

* * *

 **A/N: Yep! I'M BACK! AND I LEFT YOU AT A CLIFF! YOU MISS ME?! I MISSED YOU GUYS TOO!**

 **Sorry for being gone for so long. ._. I have an RP addiction. U_U But I will not regret it. I hope you like the chapter honestly I didn't do it alone! I HAD HELP FROM A FRIEND ON WATTPAD! I don't know her user name on here, but her name on Wattpad is 'Footballsandbows'! If you have Wattpad follow her! And me! XD Nah I'm jokin, but follow her. She keep pushing me to update, when I really wanted to be lazy. =.= Sorry but the addiction is real! 8^8**


	16. Chapter 16: We Talked, What Now?

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Hey my geeks and peeps! My dreamers and schemers! My little duckies! No your eyes are not playing with you! I'm really giving you an update! yes I know it's been a long time and all I have to say is thank you. Thank you for being patient or at least just reading this.**

 **DISCLAIMER! Oh how I did not miss them! I do not own Hey Arnold or any of these wonderful characters, only the angel, the doctor, and anyone else I _might_ add.**

* * *

 **Chapter 16: We Talked, What Now?**

 _Gerald looked down with a slight shame in his eyes. The mighty Helga. G. Pataki, was laying before him **broken**. Gerald didn't know how to take this... any of this. He felt terrible, maybe he had been to harsh... But everything she's  done, to everyone they knew, for all these **years**. He looked away, his hands still fist at his sides. Her cries had finally settled down, so that now she looked like a broken angel who's wings had been ripped off. At least that's what she looked like in her best friend's eyes._

 _Phoebe stood there clutching the end of her white dress, her face showing a heart broken expression. Phoebe sighed trying to collect her thoughts before addressing her former sweetheart. "Gerald-" She started, but was soon cut off by a slight whisper._

 _" **Phoebe, it's okay**..." The girl who seemed to be the center of this turmoil; whispered pushing herself up into a sitting position. Through many shaky breaths Helga had finally managed to... 'collect' herself. She felt vulnerable, she was exposed, **she cried! GOD HOW MANY TIMES SHE CRIED DURING ALL OF THIS!** Helga was already so close to ripping out her hair. For a moment she pondered if she would even  feel anything. Helga sat on her knees faceing the the small african ten year old. Her head was hung low before she finally spoke again. " **He's right**." She said softly, much to both of the kids surprise._

 _Gerald's head snapped over to her in shock. " **I'm right**?" He couldn't help but ask. Hadn't he just said something **horrible** to her? Yet she was  agreeing with him?! Gerald admittedly didn't know how to react to that; why were they put in such an overwhelming situation?! This time Phoebe spoke up, her voice timid and worried. "_What do you mean, Helga? _" She asked holding her hands together against her chest._

 _Helga looked down grabbing the end of her white shirt. " **He's right about how, that doesn't excuse what I've done... To any and all of you...** " She began. Gerald visible calmed down, so did Phoebe, who looked at her blond friend with a mix of surprise and awe. Helga took their silence as a sign to continue. " **I was a disgusting person to all of you...for all our lives... I don't deserve your forgiveness.**.." She started to scowl, as if she was mad at herself. Which she absolutely was! " **I did all those unforgivable things, just because I was... I was scared?** " She asked as if she didn't understand her own logic anymore. Helga laughed running her fingers through her hair._

 _" **All those years, terrified...Of my peers, of my love for the Football Head... Heck I was scared of myself.** " She gave a soft chuckles. Her once insult, now sounded like a nickname. "Yet my love for Arnold has always been my greatest strength and my biggest weakness." She smirked. Breaking down like that kinda felt good._

 _ **'Criminy! I'm officially a basket case!'** Helga thought to herself. Which is funny since she's pretty sure she had already been losing her mind, ever since all this craziness started. Helga gave a humorless chuckle at herself. Her shoulders grew slump, and she nodded, not raising her head to meet Gerald's skeptical gaze._

 _" **So yeah, at least about the first part... the things that I have done in the past shouldn't be excused... I acted awful... all because of fears and insecurities...** " Helga whispered, now sitting with her legs pulled close to her chest. "_ _ **I don't know when it got so out of control.. s-sometimes, no... every time I did something to, Arnold... I'd wish I could go back in time... I don't know, maybe hug my past self. To calm little three year old me from pushing Harold. All at once creating my heartless reputation that all but sealed my fate..**." She laughed coldly.. Wait a minute!_

 _Why is she being so open?! Few months ago Helga. G. Pataki ruled the whole 4th, 5th, and even some of the 6ths graders of P.S. 118 with an a closed iron fist! Helga looked down scowling at herself. " **Criminy! I'm such a sorry excuse!** " She yelled throwing her head back against the 'ground'. Phoebe looked at her best friend, then back at Gerald who looked down at Helga with an unreadable expression. Helga took a breath. " **To heck with it sense I'm ruining my image in the after life and what not. Gerald I'm sorry... To you personally**." She said. Once again sending Gerald for a loop._

 _He looked down at his old tormentor with skepticism, before he sat down in his same spot. " **Tell me, Pataki. What have I done to deserve my own heart felt apology?** " He asked finally taking a... breath. Phoebe sat down as well somewhat relieved by the calmer atmosphere. Helga shrugged her shoulder still making it a paint to keep her eyes closed. " **I can see now, how badly I've hurt you... Which in turn hurt one of the few people I genuinely care about in this forsaken world.** " She said slowly._

 _Gerald looked at Phoebe, who looked away. " **I'm sorry.** " Helga said pulling Gerald's attention back to her._

 _" **Helga...** " He said softly. At this, Helga sat up slowly to look at him. " **I can't say I forgive you just yet, cause in all honesty, I don't.** " He said looking into her eyes seriously. Helga looked at him with the same seriousness, and gave Gerald a solid nod of understanding. With a sigh the African-American continued. " **However, I do understand where you're coming from**." He said in a way the completely caught the mighty Pataki off guard again_

 _" **Y-You do?** " She asked holding her hand over where her heart was. Gerald looked down at his hands. " **Only from the outside looking in.. Arnold, however, has always had some faith in you.** " He looked at Phoebe with a warmth that made her blush. " **And if good people like Phoebe, and Arnold can see the good in you, maybe I should have tried instead of giving you an even harder time.** "_

 _Over the months, Helga's walls came crashing down around her no matter how much she didn't want them to. This time she didn't cry, but she looked at Gerald bewildered. " **So for your pain, Helga Pataki, I apologize as well.** " He said looking away almost feeling... awkward so to speak._

 _Helga was flabbergasted, and slightly happy. She didn't really know how to describe it. Helga closed her eyes, and gave a small huff like laugh. " **Phoebe, you sure know how to pick 'em.** " Her best friend said looking at the smaller girl fondly. Phoebe looked at her former sweetheart (former only because she's dead) smiling at him lovingly. "_Yes, I am well aware of that, Helga. _" She said looking into Gerald's eyes._

 _Helga smirked, being around Phoebe once again, and after coming to terms with Gerald... for the most part. She felt happy, yet she knew she had to ask. " **What now?** " She asked not looking at Phoebe. Gerald did look at Phoebe, who on her part pushed back her glasses. She didn't really need glasses in the after life, but she still kept them. As a reminder of her life, and the people she lived it with. _

_"_ Helga you and Gerald could still go back, it's now up to the both of you if you want to live. _" She said calmly. Gerald looked slightly surprised. He could_ **live** _? He could live... if he wanted to... if he wanted to leave Phoebe. Unknown to the African-American boy that was the exact same thought Helga had. Although she wasn't really surprised since that **is** what Phoebe told her already. Helga looked at Phoebe with a helpless looked hidden in her eyes. She didn't want to leave her best friend...not again. _

_" **Phoebe...** " She whispered softly. " **I-I don't...** " She sighed. " **Phoebe, I don't want to leave you... I still need you, I really do. We've been through to much together... I don't want to go back without you with me!** " She somehow ended up yelling, it was still her habit, even in death. Phoebe looked at her with understanding, and Gerald looked at her shocked, t _hat's exactly how he felt.__

 _ _Phoebe looked at her friend sadly.__ _"_ Helga, what about Arnold? If Gerald is here, then he really needs someone. You, of all people, should know how he feels right now. _" She said pleadingly. Helga bit her lip looking away. Hugging herself the blond had to think about what her best friend said. " **You're right, Pheebs.** " She mumbled. Phoebe smiled. "Then will you go?" She asked taking Helga's hand. Helga looked into Phoebe's eyes._

* * *

 **A/N: ALRIGHT! I FINISHED THIS CHAPTER! And I got to leave you on a cliff hanger~❤ *wink* sorry that I haven't updated in a while, I'll do better my loves. ❤**


	17. Chapter 17: Run Boy, It's A Girl!

**Life Without Phoebe**

 **A/N: Hey my sweet readers, my people, my duckies, my followers. Are you proud?! XD I give you yet another update maybe it's cause I need something to help focus my mind. *shrugs* Eh it's whatever! How about we see how Arnold is doing? And what about Miriam? Lately I've been reading fanfictions about her turning over a new leaf and becoming better... So lets make her worse. :3**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HEY ARNOLD! I DON'T KNOW IF I'LL KEEP WRITING THE DISCLAIMERS BECAUSE BY NOW YOU SHOULD KNOW GOOD AND GOD DAMN WELL I DO NOT OWN THE SHOW! ONLY THE SUPPORTING CHARACTERS I HAVE ADDED! rawr god dangit.**

* * *

 **Chapter 17: Run Boy, It's a girl! Part 1**

Arnold's heart was racing, his thoughts were a mile a minute, why was a ten year old going through all this, losing a friend, then losing someone he cares about, then losing his _ **BEST** _ friend. Was the world out to get him? As he passed a hall he heard a song, and he recognized it. Yeah it was kind of morbid for such a song to play at such a time, especially since the reason one of his friends were here is because she tried to... take her own-

Arnold listen closely to the words as he ran faster. He was still scared but he had to keep fighting. "I'm sorry, please just keep fighting for me a little longer.' He silently begged.

...

Doctor Bruner (A/N: Yeah, I changed his name) looked at Miriam with shock and horror. You'd think that Miriam would run when she was caught. Or maybe she would play dumb, but no. She had already came this far, she didn't mind getting her hands a little dirtier. Doctor Bruner took a step back when he saw Miriam's eyes narrowed into slits; it was almost like a dark shadow casted against her face.

"Now handsome, if I were you, I'd give that syringe back." She said pulling a gun out of her purse. Burner was starting to panic although he didn't show it. "If you had a gun, why would you bring poison?" He asked with his back pressed against the wall. Miriam looked at the poor man with a sadistic grin. "If I would have shot her it would have been obvious that _I_ killed her, don't you think?" She asked.

Bruner glared at the woman still holding the syringe close to him. "Miriam, that is your da-"

" **DON'T YOU DARE FINISH THAT FUCKING SENTENCE!** " She yelled holding the gun more firmly in her steady hands. "I didn't want this fucking abomination! I didn't want another child! I was _happy,_ actually honest to god happy, when I had my first child! I had the family **I** wanted!" She growled angrily, hell she might just shoot Burner out of anger.

No, she didn't want to waste a bullet if she could help it. Bruner, still very scared, and still trying to play it off. Looked at Miriam confused. "Then why not just give her away, this is a _life_ you're trying to take." He argued feeling a little more confident. Miriam laughed, she gave a loud, booming, and cold laugh. "This little bitch took my life when she was born." She hissed. "I still remember the disappointment, the soul crushing disappointment that day." She smirked humorlessly. "Even when she was born, I admit I was a little happier, but it didn't last, somewhere in me, I didn't expect it to." She scoffed.

|*|*|*|*|*|*|*|*| **FLASHBACK** |*|*|*|*|*|*|*|*|

 _"Just one more push, Miriam!" Bob yelled with an excited smile in anticipation of the arrival of his **son**. Miriam a sweaty mess looked at her husband with a glare that silenced him quickly. "I'm trying **B**! Cheese and crackers this is a big kid!" She groaned in a strained voice pushing her lower abdomen. Bob Pataki laughed lovingly and gave his wife a kiss on her forehead. "It means he's healthy!" He said still feeling giddy._

 _Miriam groaned again huffing and panting. "Healthy my ass! He's fat!" She screamed. Giving another push Miriam ears filled with the sounds of crying. Her heart started to swell a little. The sound, gave her new life, she left happy. Not only because it was all over, but because she had a new life to love and protect. The doctor looked up at the two still excited even with the new discovery. Because this is still a **"It's a girl!"**_

 _three words and all the bubbly joy, was replace with thick tension. Bob looked at his wife, while she herself gasped into her hand, looking at the doctor with joy. She didn't really see anything wrong with having another girl. **MAYBE THEY COULD BOND THE WAY SHE AND OLGA NEVER HAD?!** Miriam looked at her husband grabbing his shoulder in excitement._

 _Yet she recoiled, shocked from the dark glare he gave her that seemed to wash over her whole body. "B isn't this wonderful, another baby girl." She said softly still trying to manage a smile. Bob looked away his arms at his side. "Yes, wonderful Miriam." He said with so little enthusiasm, that it stung. Miriam opened her mouth about to give her husband a lecture, despite the exhaustion slowly creeping into her system._

 _Yet before she had the satisfaction, the doctor came over holding the new born in his arms carefully. "Mrs. Pataki." She smiled. Miriam looked at her with their newborn, renewed sparkles shining in her still tired and weary eyes. "Are you ready to hold your new baby girl?" She asked softly. Miriam could only nod her mouth hanging open. The doctor only smiled at this wonderful reaction. As tears started to swell in the mothers eyes, the doctor carefully placed the baby against her mother's chest._

 _Miriam looked down at her daughter smiling, the tears finally rolling down her cheeks, their daughter. Miriam giggled wrapping her arms lazily around the little bundle that still somehow managed to frown in confusion in her sleep, yet snuggled into her mothers chest. "She's an 8.8 pound baby and two ounces, Mrs. Pataki, very healthy." The doctor said still smiling warmly._

 _"Oh, Bob. She looks just like you." Miriam said in excitement, turning again to meet her husband's gaze, only to find him looking down at her with a cold bored expression. Miriam was shocked, his expression reached her core. Why was he looking at her like that?!_

 _Bob Pataki looked away, replying dully. "That's great Miriam."_

 _Miriam snapped, she was finally about to let him have it, when he got a call. Bob quickly reached for his phone relieved to have an excuse to leave. "I have to take this, I'll be back." He said before disappearing out the door. Miriam sat there, shocked. Holding her hand to her lips to keep from crying, she bit down on her bottom lip. Yet that was in vain as her body shook. Tears of anger rolled down her cheeks as her face turned red._

 _The doctor looked at Miriam, and her heart went out to the poor woman. She offered the new mother of two a small smile. "Come on Mrs. Pataki, we need to get you to your next room." She said softly. Miriam looked at the Doctor gratefully. "O-Oh, yes ma'am." She said... or at least that's what she thought she said, as she finally passed out holding her sleeping daughter, whose expression turned somewhat blissful close to her chest._

* * *

 **A/N: I'm sorry my little duckies this might have been a little short as well, I wanted to make this along chapter. However I want you to let Big Bob's actions to sink in. :3 I _AM_ working on the next chapter...**

 **I wonder if someone else is going to die. (030) Anyhow! XD**

 _I lost my fight, but please just hold on tight  
 _I'm watching over you, from the clouds above  
 _And sending down the purest and whitest dove  
___

 **What Arnold heard, I know the song doesn't fit the time frame, but I'm taking ALOT of creative liberties. ^~^**

 **So _reality is an illusion, gravity is a lie, buy gold, BYEEEEEEE~_**


End file.
